There are two definitions of premature ejaculation.
One is the domestic view that the penis can enter the vagina at the end that ejaculation, or intercourse does not exceed one minute that ejaculation is called premature ejaculation; the other is the foreign view that more than 50% of the number of sexual intercourse, ejaculation before female orgasm is called premature ejaculation. From the perspective of promoting a high quality of sexual life, the foreign definition is more accurate and reasonable. The domestic definition is too lenient, too “benevolent”, and does not point out the essence of the matter, but also ignores the feelings and status of women in sexual life. Personally, I think the domestic definition is inaccurate and even a bit self-deceptive.
Domestic and foreign studies have shown that more than 75% of men ejaculate within 2-6 minutes of intercourse, while women generally need at least 8-15 minutes of intercourse stimulation to reach orgasm. According to the foreign definition of premature ejaculation, wouldn’t that mean that many men are premature?
Unfortunately, this is true. Recent social surveys made show that “nearly 80% of women don’t know what an orgasm is all about”, and one of the most important reasons for this is that men ejaculate prematurely, caused by too short a duration of intercourse.
From an evolutionary point of view, premature ejaculation can be said to be innate. In the long evolutionary process, our ancestors survived in an extremely harsh environment. The harsh living environment requires men to end mating as soon as possible, to be ready to protect themselves and their sexual partners from the possible harm of the beasts roaming around at any time. And women need about 30 minutes of lying down time to facilitate the fertilization of eggs, in the uterus “fixed” (bed), which is the most basic source of sexual disharmony.
But in modern society, human beings have qualitatively improved their requirements for sex, and it is difficult to get a high quality of sexual enjoyment just by following the instinct to have sex.
In a sense, premature ejaculation can also be considered as a “concept” or “skill” disease. In some people’s minds, sex is simply “penetration, excretion”, he may not think or know that he is premature ejaculation. This type of person is not uncommon in the low culture and closed social groups; there are also some people who know they are premature ejaculation, but because they experience the urgency of the sexual urge and mistakenly believe that it is impossible to regulate and treat. These people often do not know what sexual skills are.
Some people say that premature ejaculation is a “woman’s disease” and that it is only women who suffer, which is one-sided. It is important to know that men with premature ejaculation have a great sense of frustration. If you have the misfortune to hear a “useless”, then his self-esteem, self-confidence will be doubly hit, his pain is by no means less than women. Sex is a shared experience between two people, and the unhappiness of either party can overshadow the sex life.
So what are the causes of premature ejaculation? What are the factors that determine the length of ejaculation time?
Sexual behavior is a “stimulus-response” pattern of behavior. In this case, the length of the sexual response (intercourse) is determined by the highest level of stimulus tolerance (threshold). (threshold) to decide.
For example, during sexual intercourse, the man responds to the woman’s appearance, voice, naked body, caress and other sexual stimuli, the penis erects and enters the stage of sexual intercourse, receiving further contact and friction stimulation of the sexual organs of both parties. When the stimulation reaches a certain intensity, that is, to the highest degree of tolerance stimulation (threshold), ejaculation reaction inevitably appears, the whole process of sexual response is over.
If the two sides are limited to hugging, caressing, kissing, nude play and other sexual stimulation, without entering into further sexual organ contact, sexual intercourse process, because the highest degree of tolerance to stimulation (threshold), the normal human sexual response process can not be completed, there will be no ejaculation reaction.
Mature men should understand the above phenomenon. Now, we know that the factor that determines the length of sexual intercourse is the highest level of stimulation tolerance (threshold). You can think of this as a “sensitivity switch” that determines the duration of sexual intercourse, which responds specifically to sexual stimulation. When the intensity of sexual stimulation reaches its sensitivity value (threshold), it turns on, allowing the ejaculatory response to occur and intercourse to end.
So, what sources of sexual stimulation does this sensitive switch have to stimulate it to respond?
In a broad sense, the switch responds to all sexual stimuli, including the activity of the sexual center of the brain (sexual needs, sexual fantasies), visual (visual stimulation of female appearance, nudity), auditory (pleasant and emotional words), olfactory (feminine odors), and tactile (close contact and friction of the body and sexual organs) are all sources of sexual stimulation. Among them, the most important source of sexual stimulation that determines the sensitivity value (threshold) is the tactile stimulation and the activity of the sexual center of the brain.
First, tactile stimulation: this refers to the body’s skin to skin and genital close contact, friction (sexual intercourse), which is the ultimate sexual act, the sexual stimulation is the most intense. It is this sexual stimulation that allows the sexual response to reach its highest stage, stimulating the appearance of ejaculation and the end of the sexual response.
Second, the sexual center of the brain activity: this is relatively difficult to understand some. There is a sexual center in our brain, and its activity is strong or weak we will call it the excitability of the sexual center of the brain strong or weak. This varies from person to person, and its excitability determines the length of the sexual response (intercourse).
For example, when the first sexual experience, some men just see the woman naked or just start hugging, sexual organs contact when the ejaculation reaction, this is because at this time his brain sex center excitability is too high caused by. Even couples who have been married for a while, after a period of separation, his brain’s sexual center is more excited due to a longer period of time without sex. The first time you start having sex together again, the excitability of the sexual center of the brain will be too high, resulting in a shorter intercourse time.
Or: when you just start having sex, because you are too young to be recognized by your family and society, you can only have sex “secretly”. The environment of sex is not good, fear of being discovered, the mood is too nervous and too excited, subconsciously is also hoping to ejaculate as soon as possible to end sex. It is easy to have a touch and go, a hasty conclusion.
Another situation: some men after the first ejaculation, rest a few minutes to a few hours after intercourse again, the intercourse time will be much longer. This is because, after the first intercourse of ejaculation, the sexual excitement of the brain’s sexual center has been greatly reduced, at this time, the intercourse time is extended. However, this kind of night repeated multiple intercourse is not conducive to sexual health care, should not be advocated.