Did not do well in the exam, the mood is depressed, a setback; was ridiculed by classmates, swore never to play with him again; criticized by the teacher, refused to go to school, and even so sad as to jump off the building; graduated for many years not to look for a job, preferring to be home as a “gnawing old people”…… Now the children! What’s wrong? Why is it like a porcelain that breaks at the touch of a button? Frustration is a common thing on the road of life, high IQ and emotional intelligence, life is inevitable frustration, can not stand the frustration of the child, it is difficult to live a happy life. Ou Ou father is a strange father, Ou Ou 1 year old, just learned to walk, Ou Ou father to tease his son to run, Ou Ou running with short legs, run and run, not paying attention to the fall, grinning just about to cry, just to listen to the father first cried. It turned out that the father saw Ou Ou fell down, he also hastened to pretend to fall: “Ouch, Ouch, Dad also fell down!” Ou Ou was about to cry to see his father smiled and climbed up, he also forgot the pain and cry, quickly climbed up, as nothing had happened. No matter what happened to Ou Ou, his father could always tune himself to the same “channel” as his son. When Ou Ou was three years old, he liked to eat candy, and that night he asked his mom for candy, but she didn’t give him any, so Ou Ou cried, and his dad also cried. Ou Ou looked at his dad crying, and actually stopped crying, and patted his dad on the shoulder to show his comfort. Ou Ou went to kindergarten, was bullied by other children, crying home, his father said: “I was bullied by children when I was a child, but look, it’s all in the past. Now I’m still tall and big.” After Ou Ou went to elementary school, he scored 81 points in an exam and was very depressed. His father said, “Hey, 81 points is much better than 60 points! Next time you’ll just cheer up and score 100.” This father is in an optimistic attitude to frustration, with the acceptance of the mind to meet the frustration, he is telling the child: frustration is commonplace, is life is joking with us; frustration is not you a person only have, other people also have, no big deal; frustration is not scary, came to come, it will go. What should parents do? 1, as a parent, to help children channel their emotions The teacher assigned a very large number of assignments, the child to do 9:30 p.m. also did not complete, began to get agitated, dropped the pen, cursing. How can parents help him at this time? First of all, we should show understanding, and say to the child, “Yes, the homework is a little too much, in my place I can not finish, it is inevitable that I will lose my temper.” At this point, the child will feel that their parents understand them, the irritability will be alleviated, while allowing the child to vent their dissatisfaction, hugs to appease the child. When the child calms down, help the child to think of ways to do homework, such as different subjects to do cross, divided into several small parts to do. Finally, remember to praise your child and consciously reinforce your child’s positive attitude in the face of frustration. Through the before and after the comparison, we want to tell the child: difficulties and setbacks are not terrible, the most important thing is that we always have a way to deal with it. 2.Teach your child to change his thinking Cong Cong transferred to a new school because of a move and tried to socialize with two students in his class, but neither of them played much with him, so Cong felt that he was no one’s favorite, and that school was meaningless. He cried to his parents and asked to go back to his old school. His mother felt that his child was too delicate and criticized him, “If he doesn’t play with you, you can find someone else to play with, it’s no big deal.” This is supposed to comfort the child, but the child is even more upset when he hears it. Therefore, parents can not only see the child’s poor mental capacity, but also to help him find the crux of the problem, is it a lack of social skills? Is it too short a time to socialize both sides are not too understand? Is it the child’s subjective and biased judgment? This is to make some understanding, and then planned to help the child. It is important to help children transform their thinking from pessimism and avoidance to finding solutions to problems. There is a quote from Taiwanese writer Silmurong: “Setbacks will come and go, hot tears will be shed and put away, there is nothing to discourage me, because, I have a long life, and you, you will surely come.” Yes, discouragement will surely come in a child’s life, and if the child is taught at an early age that it is as natural to accept discouragement as it is to accept the elements of nature, then discouragement is not a disaster, but a gift.