I firmly believe that verbal scolding is more damaging to children than whipping, and that scolding is often more likely to cause psychological harm than just physical harm. In the sound of parental scolding, children often do not know what to do, become timid, and grow up with rebellious tendencies. But some parents still believe in the “stick policy,” believing that if they don’t use the stick, they will spoil their children. They harden their spiritual responsibility, believing that the rod is the only way to teach their children true morality. Helen Hunt Jackson, in one of her books, tells of a Presbyterian minister who whipped his three-year-old child. In the book, the poor child was beaten alive simply because he would not recite the long prayers dictated by his father. I fear that if the boy had lived to adulthood, he would not have loved God because the harsh early training would have made him feel that God, the Almighty Father, was cruel. I have yet to meet a child who was made a success by the rod of his parents. With the improvement of material living standards and social civilization, family education is getting more and more attention, and the phenomenon of parents physically punishing their children (especially in cities) is decreasing greatly. However, it is still common to hear parents reprimanding and taunting their children who “do not fight”, the so-called “heart punishment”. Parents use harsh language to taunt, sarcastically and sarcastically their children, which is superficially more “civilized” than corporal punishment, but it is never less harmful than corporal punishment. In some ways, it may even be worse. Corporal punishment hurts the child’s body, while “heart punishment” is hurting the child’s mind. Some parents believe that children are young, no self-esteem, sense of shame, which is very wrong. In fact, two or three year old children have self-esteem, but the children’s self-esteem manifested in different forms. As a parent, you should not underestimate or ignore your child’s self-esteem. Here I would like to tell parents 10 kinds of words that can easily cause harm to their children’s hearts, these 10 kinds of words parents must be careful to use. 1, bad words, such as “stupid guy” “fool”; 2, contemptuous language, such as “useless guy” “you are simply a waste “; 3, excessive blame language, such as “you do wrong again, really bad” “how you can not do anything right”; 4, suppression of language, such as “shut up ” “Why are you so disobedient?”; 5. Forced language, such as “You must…” “If I say no, I can’t”; 6. Language of threat, such as “You have to… I will…” “I don’t care about you anymore, just let you go”; 7. Pleading language, such as “Please don’t do this”, “Be good”; 8. Complaining language, such as “You do this kind of thing, it really makes me sad” “How you again.” ； 9. language of bribery, such as “If you get 5 A’s on the test, I’ll buy you that beautiful doll”; 10. language of sarcasm, such as “You’re so good! How dare you do such a thing”. We should give our children more encouraging words in life, and give them more encouragement and praise when we see their strengths. Even if a child makes a mistake, do not scold him, but point out to him what is wrong, and explain the reason. I think these children will understand. My neighbor, Mrs. Larkins, has a naughty son, Luke, who everyone thinks is naughty and disobedient, but I don’t think so. When Luke was playing with the kids, he was no different than any other kid, and once Mrs. Larkins showed up, he acted differently. As the children were playing happily in the sand, they heard Mrs. Larkins shout from a distance, “Luke, if you get your clothes dirty again, you won’t be eating dinner!” Poor Luke took one look at his already dirty clothes and went back to digging in the sand to play. After a while, Mrs. Larkins shouted again, “Luke, come home for dinner! I’ll never leave you alone again if you don’t come back, you disobedient, bad boy!” Her shouting often led nowhere, and each time ended with little Luke being dragged home by her ears by force. Her approach, not to mention a child, even an adult will be at a loss, how can not produce a rebellious mentality? Parents who are successful in homeschooling understand the use of “good words”. They are good at observing and understanding the psychology of their children, and then choose the right time to use “good words” to touch him, warm him, and motivate him. When the child is frustrated, say a few words of enthusiasm to encourage; when the child is confused, timely with soft language to give him a wake up call; when the child inferiority complex, do not forget to use his “flash point” to ignite his self-confidence; when the child suffering, try to put themselves in the shoes of some words of comfort … . …In this way, the child’s withered ideal flowers will gradually open, the sails of life will slowly raise. Parents are the first teachers of their children, the most trustworthy people in the world, and it is the natural duty of parents to love their children. But how to love, how to educate but there is a great deal to be said. Under no circumstances should parents hurt their children with sarcastic language or sarcasm, and they should not punish their children by heart or in disguise. If you do that, it is the failure of parents and the failure of home education!