“Crazy girls produce clever ones, naughty boys produce good ones.” This quote from Bingxin speaks to the empirical evaluation of naughty children. The situation that will happen to every child growing up is that occasionally naughty and mischievous children will look mischievous and cute, but often the children who get into trouble make parents headache. When children get into trouble, make mistakes, we might as well change our thinking, try to ask children these eight questions, take the opportunity to properly guide children to learn to face and solve problems, more sensible, responsible. After the child is in trouble, ask him 8 questions The child has made a mistake, parents will inevitably be furious to come up with a series of questions. But children’s brains are not yet well developed, too much information, but they will be at a loss, plus see the parents angry face scared, more can not say anything. So, after the child in trouble, you can ask him 8 questions that will help the child to solve the problem themselves. Let’s assume a scenario: Bobo is playing with his cousin in his grandfather’s bedroom, and suddenly there is a loud noise. Bobo’s father rushes in and sees that grandpa’s alabaster pot has fallen to the floor and the two children are standing there looking at each other. 1, “what happened” encounter problems, parents often subconsciously make judgments, such as accusing their own children: “you must have broken the teapot. In addition, children look at the problem from a different perspective than adults, in the eyes of adults is wrong, but in the eyes of children may be right. If you do not listen to the child’s explanation, it is likely that he will be wronged. Therefore, parents should first ask their children the causes and consequences of the matter, and think differently. This way, even if the child is wrong, he will be willing to admit his mistake because he has the opportunity to defend. 2. “How do you feel” Dad asked the last question, and Bobo, with his head down, whispered, “My brother just pushed me, so the teapot broke.” The first thing a parent should do after a child makes a mistake is to pay attention to his inner feelings. A child sometimes doesn’t mean to do it, and often the shock is already inside; he may already be feeling guilty, but just too embarrassed to express it. Psychological studies have shown that when a person is emotional, it is difficult to receive information from the outside world, and he can’t listen to anything others say. At this point, parents may wish to ask their children’s feelings, and guide him to say, the child’s emotions will calm down a lot, it is possible to think calmly, and learn a lesson. 3, “What do you want” after asking the feeling, Bobo suddenly cried, how to persuade not to talk. At this point, parents should ask their children what they really want. The child’s heart is not so complicated, if he recognizes the mistake, at most will be embarrassed to admit it. The refusal to admit fault or cry often means that he has some purpose that has not been achieved. Parents ask straightforwardly, the effect is better. 4. “What do you think I should do?” In response to the previous question, Bobo replied, “It’s not my fault, so why just say I’m alone!” When a child states his or her purpose or true thoughts, no matter what they are, parents should not judge immediately. Whether the child’s request is reasonable or not, calmly ask him, “What do you think I should do?” . 5. “Does this work?” Bobo said, “My brother pushed me before I broke the teapot, so you say something about him too!” At this point, no matter what the child’s opinion, let him examine for himself whether it makes sense to do so. In fact, most children know the meaning of things. Bobo, for example, is not trying to get his brother criticized, but to tell his parents that it is not his fault alone. If the child has misconceptions, parents can also take the opportunity to talk with him to improve communication, but to avoid preaching, just state the facts can be. 6. “Have you decided to do this?” Check with your child if you really want to do this. Most of the time, children will choose what they think is the most reasonable way. For example, Bobo might say, “I’m at fault too, I shouldn’t have fought with my brother, you don’t say anything about him, it’s my fault.” But even if the child’s choice is not what the adult expects, it is important to respect the child’s decision. Parents who are true to their word can set a good example for their children. 7. “Did it turn out the way you wanted” If Bobo is unforgiving to his brother, dad can say to his brother, “It’s true that Bobo was wrong, but you pushed him before you broke grandpa’s teapot, so be careful next time and don’t fight in the room.” Then turn to Bobo and ask, “I said brother, what do you think? Did it go as you hoped?” Once the child has achieved his or her goal, he or she can often think calmly. This is also a good time to educate. 8. “Next time you see a similar situation, what will you do?” Children can generally do self-reflection at this point, for example, Bobo will promise that in the future will be used to admit mistakes, rather than looking for someone to share, and try to be a man, the purpose of education will be achieved.