There are often events in life that are not “sexually” interesting. What causes the lack of urge and desire? Compare with the following to see if you can find a clue and miss out on sexual happiness. Our actions are motivated by a number of factors that lead to a decline in libido, and here we are entitled to be called “killers”. Killer one: tension and stress. Our bodies often respond poorly to stress, and emotional stress can affect bodily functions, including libido and sexual performance. Recognizing that we may have underlying stressors is the first step in addressing them, and self-regulation is the first thing that comes to mind, but sometimes we need to use professional assistance to release them. Killer #2: Spouse and partner. Sex is like a tango, a dance for two. Both partners need to just to care for each other, and women especially need a sense of closeness. Poor communication, feelings of betrayal, lack of trust, repeated arguments and criticism can lead to a lack of connection and intimacy. Without a good mindset and cooperation, how can a duo dance or dance well? Killer 3: Addiction to alcohol. Alcohol is not the answer. While drinking alcohol lowers one’s own inhibitions, it can also have a negative effect on sexual performance and desire. Your partner won’t like a drunken encounter and may shut down erotic channels as a result. If alcohol becomes an “addiction”, it is even more destructive and needs to be stopped. Killer #4: Too little sleep. As with other behaviors, sexual performance is better in a comfortable and relaxed condition. Lack of sleep or proper sleep plays an accomplice role in poor sexual desire. Some people have sleep apnea, which can lead to poor sleep and lack of libido, and it’s time to turn to a doctor for proper treatment. Killer 5: Having children. Being a parent means shouldering a full-time job and from time to time craving time away from your children. Finding quiet, undisturbed intimacy and sexual pleasure requires some creative thinking, such as having a child asleep, or having someone babysit for you so you can have a valuable “date”. Killer 6: Medications. Certain prescription medications can have side effects that reduce sexual desire, such as diuretics and betablockers in blood pressure medications, antihistamines and anti-nasal congestion ingredients in cold medications, antidepressants, birth control pills, narcotic pain relievers, chemotherapy drugs, etc. If it occurs after taking the medication, consult your doctor for adjustment. Killer seven: poor self-evaluation. Sexiness is self-perceived, and many people’s lack of confidence in their physical appearance affects their sexual urges and desires. Being satisfied with yourself and on your own is paramount, and of course, a partner who identifies with you will always promote confidence. Killer eight: excessive obesity. Obesity affects a growing number of people, and being overweight can limit sexual desire by reducing sexual enjoyment, poor sexual performance and poor self-evaluation. How you feel about yourself can affect your experience of sexual well-being over a long period of time. Change is more than just the word weight loss, and sometimes requires the assistance of a medical professional. Killer 9: Erectile dysfunction. Erectile dysfunction (or ED for short) not only affects the ability to have intercourse, it can also involve a man’s evaluation of how he feels about his sexuality. Currently, there are many options for treating ED, and clinical applications that work. If needed, it only makes sense to face up to and receive appropriate treatment. Killer ten: hormone decline. Men get older while testosterone is gradually declining, but there is not necessarily a direct causal relationship between declining testosterone levels and libido. In the presence of decreased libido, this is only a potential factor, doctors will look for other factors in addition to this. Killer 11: Depression. Depression can affect all aspects of life, including the sex drive. Lack of interest in life requires treatment such as counseling and medication. However, certain antidepressants can also reduce libido, and it is important to have a doctor or therapist guide you before taking medication that has been shown to have a low sex drive. Killer 12: Menopause. Menopause brings physical changes that can affect intercourse, such as vaginal dryness and painful intercourse. There are many ways to improve this, from simple application of lubricants, to medications, to specialists, etc. We have seen so many factors that can adversely affect sex, yet more prevalent is the loss of closeness between partners over time. Making love is not just about intercourse, intimacy is important to overall love. If you find that sexual interest is waning, it may be time to inject romance into the relationship. Snuggling, caressing each other and spending time together are all elements that can rekindle the spark, while eliminating the “killers” mentioned above.