5~10 years old is the time when a child forms a behavior habit, a time when an internal rule is formed; 5~10 years old is the formation period of a child’s habit, this is a critical period to form a lot of things for a child. At this stage, many parents talk about their sons with a spring in their step, saying how smart, beautiful and capable my baby is, but you ask him how his studies are? He gets upset and says my son just doesn’t like to learn and his intelligence is not going the right way. Parents usually never teach him, do not beat him in other areas, but on the study to beat him, so do just destroy the child’s motivation. At this time the child has no reason to speak, he does not know what is good and what is not, his discernment, the left brain has not yet formed, his structural system is not complete structure, this time he is more concerned about the mother’s expression and attitude, if always scold him in learning, once the learning child’s sense of self will be very bad, he will be very nervous. When children play, mom and dad will play with him, will be happy, children unconsciously feel that when playing mom and dad will be happy, children like mom and dad happy, so he desperately play when you do not scold him, because he played when you are happy well, since he played you are happy, children certainly like to play. When the child is 5 to 10 years old to study and read books, of course, not only reading books, but reading books is an important sign, the child listen to music, play the piano, painting can be, no matter what the child does, let him get the absolute best feeling. Whenever he reads a book mom and dad should be happy, no matter if he looks crooked or upside down, don’t mind him, be happy to see him reading a book. He is also happy when his words are crooked, as long as he writes, because he will always write correctly, children do not want to imitate others, you do not make him suffer. The child can do the wrong questions, the teacher is not just correcting the questions, parents do not worry ah. Children at home, whether he is reading a book or studying ants crawling, he has absolute rights, but he watches TV is different, you let him sit up straight, like my son, I told him to watch TV sit up straight, or your back bent how to do? It’s not good for your physical development! Do not lecture your child when you eat, anyway, you have to change his habits, but do not make an effort in learning, make an effort outside of learning, as long as he is playing like crazy when you tell him, son how you have to be, son how you have to be, etc., so that he builds good habits. Learning not to tell him, when you build habits in other places, he will transition in learning, it just so happens that in his learning not to criticize him, must not criticize him in learning behavior, the child at the age of 10 understand, he knows you for his good. 5 years old he does not know if this thing is good, he just think this thing is not good, as soon as he does this thing mommy will be angry. 5 to 10 years old is very useful, if the child feels that learning is a beautiful thing during this time, as long as reading books he is full of freedom, he can use any shape, remember that this is never allowed at other times, only in learning is allowed, he will build a sense of the sacredness of learning, learning becomes a happy thing. If a small child is playing a game, do not oppose him, you can let him play, but tell him to sit straight, where to put his hands, how many right angles his eyes should be, and his mother is comparing with a ruler, he will soon stop playing games, he thinks it is always wrong to play games. You can teach him how to do, how to play, you can teach him other rules, why do you have to control him when he is reading. It is best to stimulate a 5-10 year old to learn in a sensitive way, don’t say what you learn today, what you learn tomorrow, you must use stimulate multiple knowledge systems at the same time, not just book knowledge, I can tell you that a child under 6th grade doesn’t learn anything in school, he learns social skills, interactions, social-emotional, psychological developmental structures, play, which is an important development for children until the age of 12 . The intellectual development of the child depends mainly on the satiation of perception, if he is stimulated by a lot of natural and scientific information from an early age, this psychological stimulation has a characteristic: each parent has to develop an interest of the child, and this interest, no matter what it is, even if it is the study of ants, should give him a certain depth of study, because intelligence always starts to improve from a certain point and then ripples to other categories. Now that we know this, I would suggest that the child at the age of 5 to 10 must help him to learn a certain knowledge, perhaps history, color, piano, etc., anyway, at a certain point to raise his intelligence to a high level, so that the child cope with elementary school learning will be very simple, because this intelligence is a level, if the child just like the child ” If you like your child to be “good at everything” that is “warm at everything”, because he does not have a peak of intelligence involved. Many parents do not want their children to play models, puzzles, many mothers do not let their children play, think it will affect learning, but now the concept is that if a child is doing a game, this game is also learning, learning his control of the thing and abstract understanding, including memory are going hand in hand with the development of his intellectual ability. If at that time the child likes something parents should help him, but do not force him, but to keep putting some data, information there, let him see, he will develop into a deeper thinking and understanding, this understanding into other forms, his learning will be better. Whether a child likes the school or not depends on the school environment, and whether he likes the teacher or not depends on the teacher’s personality and psychology level. If the teacher is not charming and is always mean, the good feeling about learning that the child has worked so hard to build at home will be destroyed by the teacher. I once made a statement in Beijing that the teacher should be a beauty queen and good-looking, especially before the fourth grade, and not someone with troublesome looks, because the teacher is a symbol of the school and of learning. A gentle teacher is a teacher who will always be liked by the students. Having a maternal teacher is very important in elementary school because the mother goes to work and the child is still very attached to the mother, and as a result the teacher is better than the mother, the child’s psychological development is very comfortable, he will not be blocked, he will not suffer psychological pain, and he will get close to the teacher at school. If the teacher knows some psychology and treats the student like a mother, especially in the lower grades, the teacher must be gentle and nice, or at least organized in a more comfortable way, so that the child has a good feeling, so that all the good feelings are focused on learning, and it is impossible for him not to learn. A child forms rules at the age of 5 to 10 years, and the internal rules formed by a child imitating the rules of society will bind him for life. If a large number of rules are set as a child, he is completely incapable of forming his own rules, and everything is obedience. A child who cannot form rules internally can only rely on external rules, he is sensitive to rules everywhere he goes, he desires rules, but there is one thing, when there are no rules, he does not know what to do, because he has no internal constraints, he was brought up with external constraints, and when the external constraints are not controlled by him, he becomes ruleless. Like many college students, many children are controlled by many rules at home and study very well, but once they go to college, mom and dad are gone, mom and dad represent the rules, the rules are lost, he has no internal control of the rules, he suddenly does not study, he does not know what to do, because in the past learning is his mother let him study, but if there is no reminder, he does not know what he learns. So in the 5-10 years old period, mothers and fathers have a very important task is to let children have the freedom to form internal rules, first of all, mothers and fathers should do a good job, children’s internal rules are through imitation, is through the learning, not forced, is his natural need, and not who told him how to do, excessive external rules he will obey the rules, will lose their own ability. 5 to 10 years old is a period when a child forms a model of behavior, a system of emotional models of control. Let the child understand emotions, do not make value judgments about emotions, do not say this is a good thing, that is a bad thing. After the child is 10 years old, the social culture will tell the child that this proposal is bad, but because 5 to 10 years old mother gave the child a powerful knowledge that crying, sadness, anger is a natural occurrence of people, to teach the child to learn to recognize these emotions, do not criticize him, do not say that anger is wrong, do not say that it is wrong to have hostility towards people, you can not do without hostility inside the primitive forest, anything can hurt you. Children’s emotions are a complex system, parents should not be “dichotomous”, the most troublesome thing about Chinese people and Chinese culture is that they are “dichotomous”, always looking at the world in an antagonistic way, this is something that causes Chinese culture to be very bad, we always divide things into good and bad. We always divide things into good and bad, and when you do not support the concept, you feel that this is directed at you, and children are the same. Many mothers say my communication is very good, I am talking to my children from the moment they open their eyes to the moment they close their eyes, but what the mother says is her idea, the child’s idea is to shut up, he does not want to say, the child let the mother say, this is not communication but harm. In this stage, so that the child to identify emotions, recognize the role of emotions, for example, you tell your son, you can cry but not like a girl wah wah, so that others will laugh at you, it is okay. 5 to 10 years old is to build the child’s psychological structure development period, but also interpersonal, social, ability behavior development is an important period, this important period many mothers and fathers will ignore, the child after 10 years old you then to It will be difficult to remedy and educate your child after the age of 10. Mom and child symbiosis stage will produce empathy, but some mothers did not develop the child’s empathy at the age of 5 to 10 years old, the mother can tell the child to feel sorry for small animals, the child broke the grass, the mother will say the grass will hurt and so on, this is very good, the child through this input to feel others, this child is more kind, he will not go to hurt others. In the emotion to allow the child’s emotional flow, let the child know that anger will not always be angry, happy will not always be happy, emotions like water is flowing, allow the child’s emotional flow, do not say you can not do so, you can only be happy, you can only laugh, that how possible, a person can not always happy emotions. Finally, management, children at the age of 5 to 10 years old, if the father is bad-tempered, must not lose his temper in front of children, to learn self-restraint and management.