Most people think of syphilis, gonorrhea, AIDS and other familiar disease names, perhaps because they feel very far away from their lives, so many people feel too mysterious about it, so the most common question in the clinic will be: “Doctor, I am very careful, how did I get this disease? How did I get it?” How can I get it? STDs are diseases caused during sexual intercourse, which we collectively refer to as STDs, including but not limited to syphilis, gonorrhea, condyloma acuminata, and AIDS. After years of working in the front line of the STD clinic, coupled with the special nature of the department itself, I can always see a lot of human warm and cold stories, these stories can be seen as the patient’s side, but also as a doctor’s story. It was a Thursday morning, after sending away the last patient, looking at the screen full of untreated patients list, I quickly called the next number one, that is a small, slightly fat body, with glasses, looks very simple young man, once seated I began to ask the usual consultation: “What’s wrong? What’s wrong?” The young man took out a book from the bag, which held a folded report sheet slowly stretch it, I understood what was going on at a glance, and so the report sheet in hand, out of professional conduct I organized the language began to communicate: “Young man, do you know what this report sheet means?” …… he did not speak. After a short wait I hope to make him not too worried, and adjust themselves with a normal tone of voice then said, “Your case needs to be reported to the XX CDC card, the state about this treatment is free, you do a test in the blood draw, go to the nurse’s desk to get a case and then come back to me, I build your case.” Still silent with his head bowed in silence. “Are you married?” After noticing his abnormality, I asked in a slightly professional low volume, still silent silence, but already I could hear his whispered sobs under extreme control. Every day more and more people are being pronounced with AIDS, before there might be 5-6 reporting cards per month, now I can meet 3-4 every day, most of them will cry, from the sound of crying you can also hear many kinds of emotions, some regret, some resentment, etc. From the moment he entered the door and started to be different, to his suppressed crying, I felt that I should do something for him. “I can’t help you with your future and your family, but as a doctor, I will tell you that we live in the world, prevention and elimination of bad things always come first, but now that it has happened, let’s not dwell on the past. In terms of mortality, the survival rate of AIDS is much higher than that of other cancers. What I am going to say below may not be what I should say, but now that the door is closed, I want to talk to you openly and honestly from the heart. This virus brings about a low immune system and is affected by other diseases that kill you. Nowadays, there are many combinations of treatment drugs that work very well, so for those with terminal cancer or those who fly off the road, you still have plenty of time to organize the rest of your life and live each day carefully. I hope to use all my experience and knowledge to help you maximize the pros and cons, choose the method of medication, so as to slow down the time of your complications, I am talking about the most practical aspects, you psychological pressure is less?” Probably because I was all honest, the young man finally broke down in tears and told me the story that I couldn’t believe would happen, but I chose to believe. He is not a homosexual, he and his lover is a college classmate, love 2 years after marriage and children, the child is already 3 years old, in a top 100 companies to work, everything is so natural, but he was raped by his male boss, afterwards his male boss did not tell him that he has AIDS, he is because of the recent period of discomfort, he went to the hospital to do their own examination found, he now can not face his lover and children, and also do not have the courage to reveal He is now unable to face his lover and children, nor does he have the courage to expose his boss’s behavior, let alone face the rest of his life. Don’t ask me how I decided that he is not a homosexual? And don’t ask me why I believe his story? I didn’t ask how things got to this point, and I didn’t ask if what he said was true. I chose to believe him because I believed in the trust that had been built between him and me at the time, and now that I think about it, I think the other reason I believed him was that I thought it was probably the only time he had the right person to make him talk, and it should have been the last time he could take the chance to tell the truth about the pain life had brought him. I have not seen this person once, and I can’t know if this person is still alive, so I will still remember that look, that afternoon, maybe in another decade or decades. I sincerely hope that he just changed doctors, adjusted his mind and started regular treatment. Every time I think of him, I also regret about how to deal with his violation, whether I would give thin advice, whether it would cause him not to find enough strength and courage support to face and solve the problem, but I no longer have the chance to be able to help him. For the conflict that illness brings to the family, any kind of illness, we may be conflicted over the unaffordable cost of treatment, causing financial problems for the family. We may also be conflicted about the responsibilities of family members because of the amount of time and energy needed to care for the patient, but STDs are perhaps the disease that can bring the most conflict to a family, especially in terms of trust between husband and wife, and STDs can be the most direct measure of that. Many patients with STDs come alone and ask me, “Doctor, do you think this is my lover’s problem? Did my lover infect me?” How do you expect a doctor to answer that question? How can a doctor determine which side of your life path is the problem? So as STD doctors, every word we say needs to be deliberate before we say it, so as not to cause family disputes, but the reality is that there are actually many conflicts in the clinic that we can’t avoid, and we always encounter a pair of people arguing in the clinic after being diagnosed with an STD. I still remember a couple, because in his hospital to do HPV typing test, the results in just one week, the model from the original 18,53, into 16,53,42, the woman came to the clinic with a list, want to come to ask me whether the external testing is inaccurate, did not wait for me to speak, the man heard her description directly in the clinic fight, mouth cursing to: “You What’s wrong with XX? You said XX’s and who to find ………” female wailing attracted a crowd of patients in the waiting area to look around. Such conflicts arise, what trust is there between the couple? And for me to see this scene, the mood is doubly complicated. As a bystander, the indiscriminate suspicion and even fighting between the couple made me doubt the solid foundation of their relationship. In the face of changes in the disease, where is the mutual respect and care between husband and wife, who do not wait for explanations, do not face together, and do not care about the treatment? As a doctor, I regret that the one-sided perception of the patient about the transmission route of the disease has caused the breakup of the family relationship. In fact, this can be completely avoided by patients and their families having more knowledge about the disease and giving more time and patience to the people they have always loved to solve the problem together. As the judge of the disease, I feel a great responsibility, because it affects the stability of the family or not. Therefore, compared to doctors in other departments, we in STD department will consider more humanistic aspects because this disease is based on trust and love, responsibility and respect, so any word can lead to changes in a family, and patients are often the most willing or need to judge the “cheating” person from our mouths. “The reason why it is not good to be an STD doctor is because in addition to considering the condition, we also have to consider his family and how to answer perfectly so that the patient will not find traces in our words, thus affecting the judgment of the lover and the marriage, etc. STD is a matter of two people from the beginning, and I always advocate that if both parties are sure that they are a one-to-one couple, there is actually no need to wear condoms during sex to protect yourself and increase the trauma of physical friction. For the sake of family harmony, but also for their own health, should be clean, take safe sex, fixed sex partners. If unfortunately infected with STD, we must also understand that there are various ways of STD transmission, although sexual transmission is the main way of transmission, but does not exclude the use of public restrooms, hot springs, cross transmission of intimate clothing and other ways. Doctors have been a sacred profession since ancient times, and they always carry the burden of life and death. That is why we are always in a state of learning, always aware of the latest problem-solving methods, and do our best to serve our patients with all the knowledge and treatments we have acquired, which is the most fundamental responsibility hidden deep in our bones. In this materialistic era, temptations and opportunities always overwhelm us and the couple relationship is greatly tested. I have met a couple, when visiting a doctor, the husband bought a sleeper berth for his sick wife in order to save the travel expenses, and rode the hard seat of the train for more than twenty hours by himself, and it lasted for four months. Faced with the tortuous and painful experience of many patients seeking medical treatment, the despair and helplessness when they were sentenced, the financial burden and pressure, I could feel their psychological changes such as helplessness or urgency, and I could respect, care, understand and encourage them. At the same time, the patients’ trust and cooperation, gratitude and blessings, and warm stories also deeply infected and touched me. In the face of the disease, I can face and fight with the patients, but the social problems of the patients’ families arising from the disease, I can do nothing about it in many cases, except for the coldness and regret. Therefore, although STD is always a personal subjective factor accounting for the majority of morbidity, but it does not mean that we should alienate and discriminate against them, only love and tolerance can resolve all conflicts, while suspicion, betrayal, distrust will only cause indelible damage.