Many people have a “mantra”, but have you ever noticed that since becoming a parent, it seems to have become more common? What is the most common “mantra” you say to your children? Choose the answer A. You’re great B. Hurry up and eat C. Go to bed D. I love you E. I’ll count to three Have you chosen your answer? Next you will find out which type of parents you really belong to! You are a modern parent with a lot of self-confidence and have a familiar way of educating your baby – encouraging instead of scolding, praising instead of criticizing, and letting your child grow up healthy and happy in a sunny living environment – this is the way you want to educate. The way you want to educate. Parental performance: To love your child is to love wisely and proportionately. You will make reasonable demands on your child, set appropriate goals, and set appropriate limits on your child’s behavior. At the same time, you will listen carefully to your child’s ideas and give your child attention affirmation and love. Impact on the child: Children raised in this way have a strong self-confidence and good self-control. I believe that through your way of education, he will grow up in the future, and his resilience to frustration will be relatively much higher. The most important thing is that the child’s character is healthy and optimistic. Expert advice: It is important to note that “you are great” is not the only way to praise your child, but the beautiful sunshine of the sprouting growth of the seedlings is the ever-changing sincere praise. B. Hurry up and eat The coddling type In fact, you are too soft-hearted parent, easily compromised. Maybe you really just want your child to understand that your love for him is endless. Parental performance: love your child is to let your child say what he or she wants to do unprincipled to meet the child. The child wants what he or she wants and ignores the basic requirements and rules for the child. However, sometimes you may overindulge and make your child feel that you are weak and under control! Impact on the child: It is right to give unconditional satisfaction to children under 1 year old, but to give unconditional satisfaction to children who are 3 years old will give them the illusion that they deserve everything they get, and that they do not have to suffer the consequences of doing wrong. Expert advice: you should know how to learn to say NO and insist, or let him stumble occasionally, so that the child will grow up faster than under the protection of the safety net of parents and know how to protect themselves, will be more effective than you say a hundred times! Sometimes you may want to be more rational and strict with your child, which is also very positive and effective for your child’s growth C. Go to sleep Neglect type In fact, you are a helpless parent, many times for some reason, have to give up the needs of children, in order to fight for themselves, their families and careers. Common in rural families left behind, forced to leave their homes due to the pressure of life; also common in families with excellent family conditions, parents are busy with the company and career, no time and energy to care about the children. Parents’ performance: love their children but can’t take care of them. You usually rarely communicate with each other, often difficult to meet, children by the elderly or nannies to bring up, and their own shadow as a companion. You may not be able to take care of your child’s birthday, parent-teacher conferences, children’s day, or even his test 100 points you can not celebrate with him properly. You entrust your child to others and think that is enough. Effect on the child: Your forgetfulness of your child over and over again has left him greatly traumatized. He feels no parental connection, like an outcast and unloved. Studies show that neglectful children grow up to be prone to extremes, either low self-esteem and lack of confidence, self-injury in severe cases, or aggression and hostility towards others and society. Expert advice: It’s a good idea to keep your child around more often, or to make more time for him or her. The child does not need how rich you are, what he needs most is your company and attention. D. I love you Authoritarian strict love type You are with a little authority and strong parents, you hope that the child can obediently listen to you, to be an educated and polite baby, so that the child will make you feel dignified. Parental performance: To love your child means to be strict with your child and to bring up a filial child under the stick. You rarely express your love to your child, and you think that high requirements and strict standards are the best for your child. Therefore, you will discipline your child more severely than the average person, and even set some rules of life, so that your child to follow your rules, and must do until you are satisfied. Sometimes you may be too eager and feel angry that your child is not doing what you want him or her to do. In fact, the more you want your child to do well, the more aggressive and forceful you will make yourself, and the more serious you will be in your tone and attitude. The effect on your child: A child who grows up with this impulsive parenting style will be more likely to show negative emotions and behaviors such as anxiety and withdrawal, but he may do better in school and be more obedient and disciplined. Your attitude will cause your child to have a lot of unnecessary fear and distance from you, and the parent-child relationship will be easily strained. Expert advice: don’t be too rigid in your parenting style, be flexible occasionally, this will defuse many unnecessary parent-child strife. Even when you teach him, you can use some sense of humor and a light-hearted way of speaking, tone of voice, and talk to him, or get along with your child more smiles, which will make your child closer to you, as well as have more love and dependence. E. I counted to three. You belong to the modern “filial son” type of parents, really love their children to the heart, the child’s heart is the highest point, love the child’s heart to the most extreme, everything want to be in front of the child, afraid to aggravate the child. Parental performance: only care about the children, ignoring themselves. For the sake of your children and family, you never consider yourself, always suppress your own feelings and needs, avoid your own feelings, always everything to the child as the center, sacrifice their own lives, bear the humiliation, “where has the time gone, full of children crying and laughing”. The impact on the child: sometimes you are really too worried and worried about your child, thinking too much and too carefully about everything, causing a lot of unnecessary stress to yourself and your child. In the process of growth of the child, he or she will feel too much care by parents and become less independent, even too dependent, always like an overgrown child. Expert advice: as parents, we first love ourselves well before we can love others well. Sometimes let yourself relax, don’t take everything too seriously, be happy, be comfortable, let yourself relax at the right time, don’t worry too much about your children, this will allow you and your children to enjoy more space and freedom.