I’ve heard the classic saying that parenting is a very professional job, but many of us parents are not professional. It is amazing to see the summary of German mothers in educating their children! The rigor of the Germans is evident to all. A strong nation, where does it come from? The answer is: education. You can combine your understanding of homeschooling, study and reference. For German mothers: instead of shouting, they should make a show; rules are more than pampering, and teaching by example is more important than teaching by words. German mothers’ key problems and countermeasures Q1: What should I do if my child loses everything? German mothers have three “no’s”: don’t remind, don’t help, don’t care! Q2: What if your child spends money like water? A gift for children – a reconciliation book. If you spend more money than you should, you can deduct it back! Teach the child that every penny spent is the parent’s. Q3: What should I do if my child doesn’t eat properly? German mother’s hunger education: if you don’t eat properly, you have to starve! Q4: Children grab toys, what should I do? First come, first served, or don’t even play! Teach your child that there is no absolute fairness in society, only rules and order. Q5: Your child is dragging his feet and won’t sleep? Set a time and never compromise! When parents break the rules, children will despise them. Q6: My child is in love? German mothers respect their children’s love, because learning to love and be loved is a valuable ability. 2. Ten rules of conduct for German mothers’ posts Guideline 1: Don’t do more for your child, but let your child do more. Guideline 2: Children have ten shortcomings, parents are responsible for five of them. Guideline 3: To raise children, parents must set an example. Guideline 4: Tell your child: When you fall down, get up by yourself. Guideline 5: Don’t plant the seeds of violence in your child’s mind. Guideline 6: Learning how to argue is the first step to growth. Guideline 7: Learning to love and be loved is a valuable ability. Guideline 8: Let your child grow up in collision, not in pampering. Guideline 9: Do not replace your child’s feelings with your own experience. Guideline 10: Teach your children – there is no absolute fairness in society, only rules and order. 3.The eight job tasks and rules of German mothers One of the job tasks: ability is more than achievement. Let the child become an independent and complete individual. Children are not the appendages of their parents, and they are not the successors of their parents’ unfulfilled dreams. If you want to educate your child well, you should first treat your child as an independent individual and a complete person. Rule 1: Children are like flowers and trees, they need to be cared for and trained! Dead knowledge and live ability, both are learning. Rule 2: To be good at school, but also to be capable, pets are the best teachers – teaching children to love life, to give love and to get along with animals is a kind of learning. Rule 3: If you can get along with animals from a young age, you can get along with others when you grow up, have a soft heart, care for the vulnerable, and kindness is more valuable than gold! Take care of beings weaker than yourself. Rule 4: Design different endings for stories, train logical thinking skills, use your brain, you will be able to overcome difficulties and solve puzzles. Rule 5: Learning manners from the table, anytime and anywhere opportunities to educate and develop children’s manners. Rule 6: Letting go is the first lesson of learning independence! If you can do it yourself, do not accept help from others. Rule 7: Don’t do more for your child, but “let” your child do more. Rule 8: Environmental protection is not just a slogan! Let your child know from an early age to care for the environment and protect nature. Rule 9: Trust your child’s feelings and judgment, and do not replace your child’s feelings with your own experience. Job task No. 2: Teach by example rather than by words. There is a very good saying about parenting education: Instead of shouting, it is better to make a show. What parents ask their children to do, they must first do, otherwise they have no right to ask their children to do so. Rule 10: No matter how rich you are, you must avoid unnecessary waste and personality development: Teach your children: unnecessary spending is waste! Even a few dollars is a waste! Rule 11: Reading is the basis for children to form an independent personality. Rule 12: When you fall down, stand up for yourself! The first step to take responsibility─Tell your child: This is your responsibility! When something goes wrong with your child, you are responsible for it yourself. Rule 13: Set an example and follow the rules. Start by crossing the street. Is it a small thing to run a red light? Even the smallest thing is to set an example! If parents sit up straight, children will walk right. Rule 14: A minute or a second is considered late, German mothers teach punctuality this way! If you are a minute late, you have to apologize to your child! For the sake of their children, parents must learn to be punctual. Rule 15: Do what you say you will do! Keeping your word to your child is not just talk, mom, you don’t mean what you say …… parents talk, children will keep their word. Rule 16: Be a regular visitor to the library – reading is the most romantic upbringing and opens the door to knowledge for your child. Rule 17: Home filled with beautiful music is the best way to make children like music, subtle music education, parents like, children will like. Rule 18: A harmonious family atmosphere is the best way to teach children with a calm personality; don’t plant the seeds of violence in your child’s heart. Job task No. 3: Respect is better than authority. Do not depreciate or condone, let your child grow naturally. It is the common wish of all parents to see their children grow up, yet many parents impose their ideas on their children and lecture them regardless of the occasion, with no regard for whether their children’s self-esteem is hurt. Rule 19: Love is invincible! Love your child and let him know that I’m not a foundling …… does mommy love me? Love should be spoken loudly and let the child know. Rule 20: Being condescending, loudly reprimanding, and lacking patience will only fill your child with stress. Treat your child as an individual, as an equal, and with mutual respect. Rule 21: Do not interfere, encourage more, and let your child learn on his or her own. Rule 22: Even if your child makes a mistake, you can’t just reprimand him/her, he/she also has dignity, it’s not the child who is untalented, it’s the education that is wrong. Rule 23: Encourage children to argue with adults. Rule 24: Respect your child’s right to speak, understand your child’s ideas, and speak to your child in a half-crouch, with eyes on each other. Rule 25: A child should be given love, not harm. Loving and being loved is the most valuable ability. Rule 26: Respect the love of the child. Rule 27: Education that lacks corporal punishment is incomplete education. Job task No. 4: It is better to suffer than to be compensated. Moderate tribulation is the best exercise for children. Compared with children in other countries, German children are notoriously resistant to setbacks. How do German parents develop their children’s resilience to setbacks? One of the ways they do this is through the use of ordeal camps, which involve children in almost cruel training activities. You may think this is cruel, but German parents think this is love for their children. Because, to love children, you have to make them strong. Rule 28: Let your child grow up in collision, not in pampering, and hone his extraordinary courage and boldness in order to protect himself. Rule 29: Not allowing your child to do household chores is harm, not love! Let your child experience that there is no such thing as getting something for nothing. Rule 30: Let children understand the dark side of society and learn to protect themselves. Rule 31: German hunger education: If you don’t eat properly, you’ll starve! Rule 32: A mitzvah for children: try to travel alone. Rule 33: Children have ten flaws, parents are responsible for five of them. Affirm your child’s strengths, and don’t forget to review the weaknesses. Rule 34: Let your children suffer more, so they won’t suffer when they grow up. Rule 35: A small amount of clothing keeps you warm, a large amount of clothing is a burden. Post Task No. 5: Rules are more important than pampering. Tolerance without indulgence and establishing rules are more effective than preaching. How can we teach our children effectively? Many parents do it by constantly preaching, but smart German parents will set rules for their children and build a sense of rules from an early age. They will negotiate with their children, set some rules, and ask them to follow those rules. Rule 36: When you set rules, stick to them and make your child follow the agreement is the key! Rule 37: Parents don’t help when their children can do it themselves. Rule 38: Children will follow the rules only if parents are consistent in what they say and do. There are two principles for treating children: make a deal beforehand and be uncompromising afterwards. Rule 39: Establish the concept of “can and can’t, can and can’t”. Rule 40: There is no absolute fairness in society, only rules and order. Rule 41: If parents break the rules, children will despise them. Rule 42: Manners are not innate, but are cultivated later in life. No one can go wrong by behaving politely. Post Task No. 6: Free rearing is better than captive rearing. How can you teach good children when you can’t do this or forbid that? In the eyes of parents, every child is a seed and is bound to become a big tree. In the process of growing into a big tree, the gardener must make great efforts, such as cultivating the child’s self-care ability, cultivating the child’s good character and good habits, giving the child encouragement, cultivating the child’s ego and the spirit of initiative for performance, etc. Rule 43: Teach your child to be independent and not to surrender. Rule 44: Cultivate good habits, you can cultivate good character, teach from small, start from small things. Rule 45: Tell your child not to be calculating and take the bull by the horns. Teach children to learn to forgive, forgiving people, who is right and who is wrong? “Forgiveness” is the answer. Rule 46: Ten points is progress, one point is also progress, child, you are not stupid, just have not yet learned. Rule 47: Encouragement and affirmation are the necessary rain and sunshine for growth, cultivating self-awareness and teaching children to be their own masters! Rule 48: If your child says “no” out loud, be happy for him. Encourage your child to express his own ideas and to refuse the requests of adults. Rule 49: Don’t confuse modesty with self-expression. Let your child learn to express himself, convey his enthusiasm, and teach him to stand up, sing and speak out. Post Task No. 7: Freedom is greater than restriction. Give your child room for independence and development will be infinite. In the eyes of German parents, every child is an independent individual. They are neither attached to nor dependent on their parents. They have their own independent space and are equipped with independent thinking. Therefore, German children grow up with the goal of independent development. As a parent, you just have to give your child the freedom to do so. Rule 50: See the characteristics of your child as well as the characteristics of other children, remember! Each child is unique, and comparing the strengths and weaknesses of two children will make them lose themselves. Rule 51: Don’t compare your child’s weaknesses with other children’s strengths; belittling your child will bring your child’s confidence to zero! Do not belittle your child, but encourage your child to learn from others. Rule 52: Avoid parent-led education, avoid comparative education methods, and raise your child according to his or her personality. Children should also be taught according to their abilities, and different children need different education programs. Rule 53: Give children more free space and learn to be responsible for themselves. Parents who peek at their children’s diaries are the same as violating their children’s freedom! Close to nature, free-range children have a broader eye! Rule 54: Children should be free-range, not captive. Rule 55: Think before making decisions, be responsible after making decisions, let children make their own decisions and be responsible for them, let them make their own decisions and develop their own opinions. Job task No. 8: Self-control is more important than control. Establish a financial perspective from an early age and teach your child to save up to the first bucket of money. Germans are rich, but definitely not extravagant, so the average annual consumption in Germany is not very high, which is mainly due to the financial education of German parents to their children from childhood. With this education, German children develop very good financial habits from an early age: they don’t spend their allowance, they always go to the bank to save money, and they are frugal even when playing games. Rule 56: Instead of giving more money, learn how to use it. Rule 57: Second-hand bazaar experience, so that children learn common sense in trading, hold a children’s yard sale, so that children can experience the buying and selling process. Rule 58: Wasteful at play, and wasteful in real life, “Do you know how much a missile costs?” Take the opportunity to educate even when playing games! Rule 59: Have your own account, save your own pocket money, open a bank account for your child, learn money planning from a young age, give out red packets vs. the financial view of the ledger: teach your child the power of keeping accounts! Rule 60: Let your child know that the extra money spent belongs to the parents. Rule 61: Think before you buy something, you can’t ask for more money after you spend it, take your child to the bank to save money, feel the atmosphere of saving, learn to control your desire, tell your child: spend every penny with consideration! Tell your child: spending money frivolously is an indulgence of desire! Rule 62: If you spend money recklessly as a child, you will not know how to be frugal when you grow up. Take your child to the bank, the key is not how much money to save, but to have a sense of saving.