It is said that parents are the baby’s initiation teacher, in fact, such a statement is right, in the face of your baby when your every word and deed will affect the baby, so in the face of their baby must be to play a positive role in the side, do not because of your momentary negligence to affect the baby’s life. Bad habits 1 busy work pressure, come home to see 4-year-old daughter is not the time to be loud and noisy, you finally can not help but yell: “Why always cry ah cry ah! Stop crying, you’re such a pain in the ass!” Reminder: A child who has self-respect and respect for others must have been respected by adults first. If we do not give our children this respect and are rude to them, they will take it for granted that others should do what I say, and it is difficult for them to put themselves in other people’s shoes. Bad habit 2 Married for many years, you and your lover often quarrel in front of your daughter over some trivial matters such as “why buy chicken and not duck”, and then make up for it afterwards. Reminder: Our hostility and quarrels provide a bad example of aggressive behavior for our children. We quarrel when the demeanor, posture, tone of voice, phrases are seen by the child, remembered in the heart, later the child in the game, on the doll tender voice scolding, hit the doll hard, or foul language, swear words to children. Bad habits 3 You work hard, thrifty family, can not afford to buy new clothes for themselves, but the son is very generous, he wants Ultraman, want Superman are given, and do not tell him to save. You think: the only child society, is not for a child? Reminder: Our “love” will make the child only know to, do not know how to pay, how can children appreciate the hard work of earning money? Bad habit 4 Every day you come home from work, always habitually ask your daughter: “How was your day at kindergarten?” As soon as you ask, you are busy cooking, tidying up your room, or reading the newspaper. Reminder: We act as if we are telling our children, “I don’t care about your answer; all I really care about right now is getting dinner ready in a hurry, or tidying up the room, or reading today’s newspaper.” This approach only yields a surprising and exasperating answer from the child: “Nothing,” “It’s fine,” or “It’s okay.” Thus, our children learn from us to be perfunctory. Bad Habit 5 Your son fights with another child over a toy, and you punish him for a week for not playing with it. A few days later, you realize that you have punished your child a little too much, but you think: “Parents should be consistent in their words and actions” and convince yourself that you don’t want to take back your words. Reminder: We make mistakes and refuse to admit them, and our children follow them to the end. Bad habit 6 The TV is broken at home, you ask your son’s uncle to help fix it. When the appointed time comes, the uncle calls and says he can’t come because of an emergency. You hang up the phone and complain to your children and wife: “Your uncle is so untrustworthy! Never ask him for help again.” Reminder: Blaming and complaining not only don’t help, but also set a bad example for our children: when facing disappointment, we don’t actively try to solve the problem, but just blame and blame others. Bad habit 7 After dinner, your daughter is clamoring for you to tell her a story, but you are always busy with other things: tidying up the room; answering emails or checking some messages; just about to sit down to tell a story, and then suddenly you have something to take care of. Reminder: Our behavior makes our children understand the “truth”: there is only work and no play in life, there are only chores and no games in the family, and in order to survive and live in this society, we must work 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Bad habit 8 You and your son are waiting in line to pay at the supermarket. A woman cuts in line and stands in front of you, you ask her to go to the back of the line, but she ignores your words, so you raise your voice and argue with her, and end up arguing. Reminder: Our approach trains children in the wrong social skills, making them believe that arguing, name-calling and even fighting are good ways to resolve conflicts. You will then often see children arguing or fighting with children over toys. Bad Habit 9 You are a member of the kindergarten parent committee and the teacher asks you to help write a few small articles for the school newspaper, but you have been so busy that you can’t finish the articles the day before the deadline. At this point, you call the teacher and tell her that you are sick and ask her to find another parent to write them. Reminder: without trying to back out first, then, we usually tell children to “do what you say, never go back on your word” the shining image of ruined, children learn to put the promise behind them, by lying and make their own easy to shirk. Bad Habit 10 The road to marriage has finally come to an end and you are filled with resentment towards the other party. So you tell your 6-year-old daughter to count the faults of the other party and tell her, “Daddy/Mommy doesn’t want you anymore, so you should never pay attention to him again.” Reminder: By doing this, the child learns to hate and to wreak havoc, make trouble and retaliate when he/she fails to achieve his/her goal. Bad habit 11 One day, you suddenly find out that your lover is having an affair! From the beginning of the shock and panic, to the final tolerance, you tell yourself: “as long as he / she still want the family on the line, what else do you want, is not to give the children a complete home?” Reminder: The seemingly complete home we create with “good intentions” does not give the child enough warmth and love, and what the “bedfellows” and “seemingly separated” bring to the child will be distrust of life, distrust of human love. The children will be distrustful of life and misunderstand the true love of human beings! Bad Habit 12 On the issue of marriage, your mother-in-law has been obstructive, so after marriage, you never respect the elderly, and never take your son to play with the elderly, and often curse the elderly in front of the children behind their backs. Reminder: do not set an example of filial respect for the children, then one day the evil will come to your own head. Bad habit 13 You always used to throw things around, your wife will clean up everything you throw around and never need you to worry about it. Reminder: In this way, children will also develop the habit of putting all the responsibility on others. Bad habit 14 You always encourage your children to learn Confucius to give up the pear at home, but on the bus with the elderly, children to grab a seat, or under the “no entry” sign let children climb on the statue to pose. Reminder: we say one thing, do another, for a child who has not formed a proper sense of morality, when he grows up to face the challenges and temptations of modern society When he grows up and faces all the challenges and temptations of modern society, it is difficult to have the strength to guard himself well. Bad Habits 15 When your child is late in leaving the playground, and you urge him to leave again and again, only to see fewer and fewer children, you say to him, “All the other children have gone home, so it’s time for you to go!” Finally the child is dragged away. Reminder: We always measure our children by the standard relative to other children, which will make children focus on comparing with others, and internalize this into their own code of conduct, and when they grow up, they will be easily influenced by others. Bad Habit 16 There’s another traffic jam on the road and you pull out of the emergency lane. Your 5-year-old daughter in the back asks you, “Why are we going this way?” You say, “There are no police here, and no cameras, it’s okay.” Reminder: When we break the rules when no one is supervising, our children learn that it’s okay to do anything as long as they don’t get caught. Bad Habit 17 You are busy in the kitchen and your 6-year-old son comes in and wants to help, so you push him out of the kitchen: “Go, go, go, go, don’t be a nosy kid. Reminder: Our “love and care” for children, so that children think that everything is the parents’ business. Bad Habit 18 At dinner, you tell your lover indignantly in front of your child: “Xiao Wang was promoted, what’s so great about him, he only knows something about computers ……” Reminder: We do not admit that we are inferior to others, children will learn to be self-centered and do not think about progress .