Near the end of the year, resentment and complaints about work have become the “daily report” of many people in the workplace.
”I’m too tired!” “The work target is too high, it’s impossible to do!” “I used to love this job, but now, the more I do it, the more boring it is!” Such and such complaints are endless. It is no wonder that the end of the year, all walks of life are “punching targets, write summaries, set plans”, the workload increased sharply, but also in the face of rising prices and soaring costs of living, it is inevitable to feel mentally and physically exhausted, the New Year has become the New Year’s Eve, and even many people have insomnia, headaches and other physical symptoms. Under the heavy pressure of work, some people frequently jump from job to job, some people neglect their work, and more people are trapped in the whirlpool of complaining, dragging and suffering. Wenjuan Liu, Department of Medical Psychology, Zhongshan Hospital, Fudan University
In 2005, the media conducted a “work happiness index survey”, and the results showed that the work happiness of Chinese working people was in the lower middle of the range. For most people, work not only means paying time and energy, getting a sense of value and salary, but also comes with stress, boredom and other troubles, and “happiness at work” has become an unattainable luxury.
How to resolve occupational stress, get rid of burnout and improve happiness at work? This is the problem that people in the workplace need to face directly.
Career development, workload, interpersonal relationship and work-family balance are the main sources of stress for people in the workplace. As far as individuals are concerned, the sources of stress may vary and may have to be analyzed for specific problems, but some general ways of coping can still be summarized.
Career newcomers DDD implement effective time management and actively cope with difficulties
Zhang graduated from college a year ago and is engaged in design work in his current company. During the university period, he was accustomed to blitz before the exam, and often delayed after work, and could not complete the task until the last time. In the last three months, work tasks are heavy, time is tight, and unexpected situations are constantly. Zhang felt that the time is always arranged badly, work efficiency is very low, every day exhausted, but also always criticized, deeply distressed, the idea of job-hopping.
Many newcomers to the workplace have just left school, used to “a semester of sheep, two weeks of surprise” way of learning, after the workplace, still can not adapt to the independent arrangement of time and work rhythm. Effective time management method is to do things in accordance with the priorities of the distinction and queue, the urgent things in front of the priority to complete, the important things to allocate more time and energy. To be good at the work of “whole into zero”, each crack. At the same time to change the bad habit of procrastination, you can use some external means to give yourself the necessary reminders, such as listing the time schedule. At the same time, you can flexibly adjust the pace of work. For example, the most difficult problems listed can be arranged in the most efficient time of the day, but also in their own long work feel tired when the appropriate stop, some “loose rest”. By controlling these rhythms, you can effectively improve your work efficiency and relieve the tension and boredom caused by long hours of continuous work.
Newcomers to the workplace do not have too much attachment to the unit, it is easy to jump jobs frequently, but need to understand that this may be a way to escape from difficulties, and can not solve the fundamental problem. As a newcomer, you need to accumulate experience and contacts, as soon as possible to improve the ability in all aspects, if you encounter difficulties on the job-hopping, after a few years, the ability does not have any improvement, age advantage is no longer, I am afraid to face the risk of unemployment.
Career stalwarts DDD fully understand themselves and break through the development bottleneck
Miss Li graduated from college six years ago, has been responsible for data collection and organization work, careful and meticulous, never make mistakes, although few words, but easy-going, good people.
One year ago, the company’s leadership promoted Miss Li to be the head of the department, sent to the branch, responsible for the coordination of engineering and construction-related departments. Ms. Li gladly took office, however, due to the lack of organizational management and flexibility, the face of various contradictions, the problem can only be asked for help from the head office, the new official “a fire” did not burn up, but a series of setbacks, Ms. Li felt physically and mentally exhausted, and gradually, the company’s leadership to promote Ms. Li to be the head of the department, expatriate branches, responsible for the coordination of construction-related departments.
Ms. Li felt physically and mentally exhausted, gradually appearing shallow sleep and dreamy, loss of appetite, back pain.
Many people, like Ms. Lee, hear negative comments about themselves at work, they will completely lose self-confidence, unable to look at themselves objectively.
The doctor asked her to compare what changes in the leadership’s evaluation of her, she was aggrieved, “I used to say that I was obedient, cautious and steady, and my work performance was very good, but now I am said to be hesitant, unassertive, poor communication skills, completely incompetent. The doctor couldn’t help but smile, and gave her three equations: “cautious = hesitant, obedient = no opinion, proper = poor communication skills”.
To fully understand yourself, you can put forward reasonable expectations for your work. Sometimes, it is not the work that frustrates you, but our expectations of the work that frustrates you. When the leadership proposed the promotion of Miss Li, she was apprehensive, worried about her introverted personality, poor communication, but still readily agreed. Verbally said only to “improve the ability to train themselves”, but inwardly expect to get everyone’s approval, to make a career, the results underestimated the difficulties, overestimated themselves.
The barrel theory says that the height of a bucket depends on the lowest plank; however, success in life often depends on how much one’s strengths are brought into play. It is easier to make use of your strengths and avoid your weaknesses to work like a fish. If you must “improve your ability and exercise yourself”, then you need to have a spectrum in mind, need more effort for a longer period of time, need to improve in a systematic and planned manner, and if you encounter criticism, you should understand that this is the price of growth.
Workplace management elite DDD proper handling of interpersonal relationships
Ms. Wang is a famous foreign company’s human resources director, work has been smooth, position all the way to three jumps, is a typical workplace “doula”. Four months ago, the company’s personnel suddenly changed, and the new leader had a long-standing grudge against Ms. Wang because of the conflicts in the past work, and at the beginning of her tenure, she made difficulties to Ms. Wang, setting unrealistic and difficult workload, and often blamed and criticized in a dignified manner. Ms. Wang has tried to communicate and defend, all to no avail, at this time colleagues and other leaders have shown indifference, Ms. Wang felt sad and indignant, and very confused, they are doing personnel work, in interpersonal communication and conflict resolution have a wealth of experience, how to end up in a situation on all sides?
Improper handling of interpersonal relationships in the workplace often restricts our development, especially when we become managers, certain rules may need extra attention.
◆ Praise others.
Learning to find and appreciate the merits of others, mutual affirmation and acceptance are the cornerstones of harmonious co-worker relationships. When complimenting others, the attitude must be sincere, trying to discover the strengths of others, not to boast without basis, which will instead hurt others.
Especially when we become managers, we also need proper praise and affirmation for our subordinates. A supervisor who is too harsh will often incur the resentment of his subordinates.
◆Think differently.
People observe problems habitually from their own point of view, only taking into account their own interests, wishes, emotions, wishful thinking, therefore, it is often difficult to understand others and communicate with them. If you want to deal with interpersonal relationship between yourself and others, the most important thing you need to do is to change the one-way observation and thinking from your own point of view, and to observe each other from each other’s point of view and think about each other.
◆Tolerance for others.
Tolerance of people is a necessary quality for managers.
When we treat everyone with kindness and generosity, it is equivalent to treating the whole world with kindness and tolerance, our body and mind will be happy and our heart will be open. When managing subordinates and coordinating with other departments, it is very important to treat people with tolerance. Even if the other party has some rude words for a while, we should still discuss the matter and deal with the problem calmly. It is a big taboo in the workplace to snitch and sue, and you should try to resolve conflicts with each other directly as much as possible to avoid future interpersonal hidden problems.
◆Learn to refuse.
A person who only rejects others will attract everyone’s rejection, and a person who only compromises with others will not only be aggrieved, but also be regarded as a good old man, low ability, unbearable, and easy to be used. Therefore, you should pay attention to adhere to certain principles at work and avoid being involved in incidents such as endangering the interests of the company, ganging up on others, and damaging others.
When you encounter such a situation, you should pay attention to maintain neutrality and avoid being exploited. If you encounter mental violence in the workplace, first of all, you should stay calm and never make a fuss.
Then calmly analyze the cause, you can initiate a conversation with the other party and communicate gradually and sincerely.
If it does not work, do not just hold back, to dare to say “no”, to express their views clearly, and actively seek help from superiors and colleagues, so as not to encourage each other’s violent behavior.
Workplace women DDD master the balance of work and family
Ms. Wu has been married for four years, since two years ago after maternity leave to work, every day life is like a war, the heavy work during the day, the boss’s harsh, complex interpersonal relationships have made her exhausted, and at night home with the children, housework, not to win. The most intolerable thing for Ms. Zhang is that her husband not only does not understand her hard work, but also often criticizes her lack of patience with children, sloppy housework, and even “not like a woman”. In the past six months, the couple’s conflict gradually escalated, almost every day quarrel. Ms. Zhang’s work status is getting worse and worse, often make mistakes, every day feel exhausted, isolated, very disappointed with life, do not know how to get out of the current predicament.
A beautiful, harmonious and loving family gives each family member the confidence to live and the courage to overcome difficulties. For most women, wife and mother are even more important roles that cannot be avoided to achieve self-worth. To make the family a real shelter and a fuel station for personal development, not a battlefield for war, is a must for professional women to achieve a happy life. For professional women, they need to understand that both work and family are long-term struggles, and it is impossible to make a long-term success. Therefore, we might as well take it easy and take care of the needs of the family in the process of achieving our work goals, so that both will have a win-win surprise.
◆Actively communicate and turn negative into positive.
Many couples have only one way to communicate every day, and that is to quarrel. The two people who are angry can’t express their opinions rationally, and the original intention of saying “you just lack patience” turns into “you are an impatient person” as soon as they open their mouths. Most families do not lack opportunities for communication, but only negative and unproductive communication. Successful couples spend a lot of time and energy listening to each other, and the conversation is open, all-inclusive, and funny. In such a relaxed atmosphere, they confide in each other a lot of innermost messages. In this way, they can eliminate the impulses and frictions between each other and make the family life more harmonious and solid.
◆Take on family obligations and learn to think differently.
If one of the spouses takes care of all the household chores, it is easy to feel resentful. Both parents are busy working and neglecting their children, which also sows hidden dangers for the growth of children and parent-child relationship. How to balance work and family and reasonably allocate energy and time requires careful trade-offs, and it is not only a problem for either parent, but requires joint coordination between both parties.
◆ Share good times and create a family atmosphere.
Vacationing with family members, playing games, sharing good food in nature, these good times make family life fun and bring family members closer to each other.
◆Learning and improving in life, successful handling of family stress and crisis.
The pace of life is getting faster and faster, the cost of living is getting higher and higher, the pressure on families is increasing, and the emergence of crisis is inevitable. Crisis is a crisis on the one hand, and an opportunity on the other. Stable families do not have smooth sailing, but are good at finding new ways to solve problems in difficult times to resolve various conflicts.
Like Ms. Zhang, many families have intensified family conflicts after the birth of their children due to changes in family structure and the increased roles of family members. In the face of this situation, both spouses, as the core role of the family, need to actively adjust their posture, adapt to the new role as soon as possible, mutual understanding and face problems together.