The vast majority of sexual disharmony between husband and wife is not due to disease or physiological disorders, nor is it a psychological problem, often because one or both parties have certain misconceptions about sex, which leads to specific behavioral contradictions and conflicts. Here, the main talk about the most common Chinese men’s several sexual misconceptions. A, too much attention to the number and frequency of sex There is an opinion among men, it seems that the more times sex, the more qualified the man, the more masculine; his wife will be more satisfied, the happier. On the contrary, the number of husbands is said to be less “can not serve (or can not deal with) the wife”, is considered “not manly enough”. In fact, most wives do not think so, emotional communication and sex life, according to experts on 31 large and medium-sized cities 1279 couples survey (the following figures are based on the survey), 78% of wives pay more attention to the former, rather than the latter. The number of times of sex alone versus the quality of sex (how many orgasms the wife can get from it), 85% of wives prefer to get high quality rather than high quantity. Men’s sexual practices are not “more is better” either. Between the ages of 30 and 35, more than half of husbands experience a quiet shift in their sexual needs, from a need for quantity to a desire for quality and a deeper emotional connection and experience. Because of this, a man who conceptually believes that the frequency of sex is the main, or even the only, measure of marital harmony is likely to produce two behavioral failures. One, he may ignore or deny his wife’s emotional needs, sexual life simplistic, into a series of actions, serious will also greatly harm his wife’s personality and emotions. Second, he may invariably add to his own psychological burden. Once older, or occasionally encounter special circumstances, can not maintain his perceived high frequency, will suspect that he has “impotence”, “premature ejaculation” of the “disease”, will be afraid “The more powerful you are, the more you will be able to do. As a result, the stronger you are, the less you can withstand accidents. In fact, the frequency of men’s sex life is basically determined by the physiological condition and age, the world’s ethnic groups are similar, and almost every man’s life, there will be some periods less, and some periods more, not even talk about “should have how many times” such a problem. Men’s sex appeal is mainly in the mature personality style, understanding of the thick chest and emotional depth of persistence. If you do not pay attention to these aspects of cultivation, but care or bragging about the frequency of sex, then it is difficult for men to get out of the misunderstanding of sexual life. The role of overemphasis on sexual skills in a particular couple of specific situations, extremely appropriate sexual skills will have a beneficial effect. But we must not forget that sexual skills must have four fundamental prerequisites: first, both spouses must be absolutely voluntary, really need. Otherwise, not only is the violation of each other’s human dignity, but also will cause psychological harm to both sides, must not produce good results. Second, the couple must be quite good feelings. Third, the level of sexual knowledge and attitude of both parties must be very consistent. Fourth, the sexual techniques used must be rigorously tested scientifically and clinically proven to be applicable. Any inconsistency in the couple’s feelings and knowledge, any hearsay and half-understanding, will make the sexual techniques have the opposite effect. Especially important is the fact that sexual techniques by themselves can neither create love and concern, nor communicate adequately. In our country, at least half of the wives neither need nor appreciate their husbands’ sexual skills. They especially resent their husbands treating themselves as some kind of “tool” or “stage”, where men are bent on “using” or “performing “. In this case, the couple will only grow apart, indifference and even conflict. All the happy couples know that the most advanced, the most universal “sexual skills”, in fact, not the action but the mind, is as much as possible to love, attachment, intimacy and care of the true feelings poured and concentrated in the sex life. Sexual life is a vehicle for expressing love. It must include a prior stage of psychological preparation, and the final result depends to a large extent on the appropriateness and adequacy of the preparation stage. Some husbands see their physical process as the first and unadjustable, with the result that they are often too eager, rough and simple. In our urban couples, those who have never kissed each other account for 1/4, and more than half of those who have never kissed deeply; those who do not touch their wives at all account for 41%-53%. However, at the same time, 83% of them consider their marriage to be very satisfactory or relatively satisfactory. This shows that it is not that the husband does not love his wife, but that he does not love, overemphasizing the final physical result, but neglecting the process of emotional preparation. In a side-by-side comparison, almost 100% of certain highly educated, highly emotional couples have had and often have almost all kinds of caressing behavior. They truly see sex as a life, as “making love” rather than as a physical task. This is certainly beneficial to the stability and quality of the marriage and is worth promoting.