As we all know, the characteristic of a parabola is that its height climbs continuously, and after reaching its highest point, its height gradually decreases. Recently, we encountered several cases in psychological counseling, and the parabola with two-dimensional axes can illustrate the common characteristics of these cases. Case 1: Mr. Zhang is an aerospace engineer in his early 40s, the second oldest in his family, with an older sister, two younger brothers and a younger sister. Mr. Zhang is the most promising one among many children, and is the proudest child of his parents. Mr. Zhang grew up frail and sickly and almost died when he was 3 years old, but he always excelled in his studies and was able to go to university and stay in a prestigious unit in Beijing, with a virtuous wife and a lovely daughter. His parents are in their sixties and live with a younger brother, both in their hometown in the countryside. Mr. Zhang is in the best financial situation, but his parents have a monthly pension of thousands of dollars and do not need his money. Once a year, Mr. Zhang visits his parents in his hometown, and usually his two younger brothers mainly take care of them. The main problem that Mr. Zhang came to consult was the excessive worrying about his health condition in the past ten years, which made himself simply unbearable. Sometimes when he felt a little tightness in his chest, he would get very scared, worrying that it was a myocardial infarction, and rushed to the hospital for a checkup. There were no abnormalities in various tests such as electrocardiogram, cardiogram and ambulatory electrocardiogram. Mr. Zhang can be a little relieved, but not for long, as long as a little chest discomfort, will again think about whether it is an emergency heart attack? Sometimes there will also be a sudden thought that I will have heart disease and get upset about it, and then I will feel really uncomfortable in my chest, and the more I do this, the more I worry that I will have heart disease. As long as there are some symptoms of cold, such as runny nose, cough, coughing phlegm, etc., Mr. Zhang will be very nervous, worried that he has pneumonia, or even lung cancer, and needs to rush to the hospital for examination. Bought an electronic blood pressure monitor, often to their own blood pressure, Mr. Zhang slightly feel uncomfortable when they measure, as long as a little higher will be very afraid that they will have a cerebral hemorrhage, rushed to the hospital, the doctor let it quiet, blood pressure is often normal again. Mr. Zhang clearly knows that he currently has no serious organic disease, but is just a little bit of discomfort excessive fear and caution, which has seriously affected his work efficiency and quality of life. Diagnostically, Mr. Zhang suffers from disease phobia, a form of hypochondriasis. What are the factors that make Mr. Zhang so wary of his own health? We found that the diseases that Mr. Zhang fears are serious diseases, such as myocardial infarction, lung cancer, and cerebral hemorrhage, all of which are fatal diseases that lead to death. When asked if he is afraid of death, it is interesting to note that Mr. Zhang answers that he is not afraid of death. Is that true? Through understanding, we learned that Mr. Zhang now has a wish, and so on another ten years, he retreated to repair, back home to spend more time with his parents, and his mother is not very good health, so ……, it goes without saying that Mr. Zhang has a very big worry, his wish is likely to not be realized, from the mother may die prematurely, that will be more guilt. But Mr. Zhang does not want to face this reality, instinctively made a transfer, that is, the worry about the death of his mother to the worry about his own death, the degree of this worry is so great that Mr. Zhang said not afraid of death. What he was worried about could be the disease that led to death. Using Socratic questioning, I followed up with Mr. Zhang: What would happen if you had an emergency heart attack, lung cancer, or a brain hemorrhage? He answered he would die, and then what would happen? He replied that would be great, his parents can’t accept it, his wife and children can’t take care of it, I am only 40 years old, for so many years, I have been the pride of my parents, but I have not done my duty, still waiting for retirement to accompany my parents, I can’t accept to die now. It can be seen that Mr. Zhang has a strong fear and avoidance of death. In fact, for death we all fear, no one wants to die, but we usually seldom consider death, because death seems to be very far away from us. But why did Mr. Zhang frequently react with fear of death? He grew up frail and sickly, and had a premature experience of death at the age of three, which doomed him to be sensitive to death. As he grew older, his career became successful, his own family roles and responsibilities increased, he became aware of his own importance, and his parents’ health deteriorated, all of which triggered a desire for health and a fear of illness and death. The moderate fear of disease and death is what led people to learn to be hygienic, to obey social rules such as traffic order, to seek prevention and control of diseases from nutrition, aesthetics, psychology, sports, music, art, etc., and the quality of life was continuously improved. If the horizontal coordinate represents the degree of fear of disease and death, and the vertical coordinate represents the quality of life, the relationship between the two is in the form of a parabola. As the degree of fear increases, the quality of life keeps improving, but if it exceeds a certain degree, i.e. beyond the optimum point, the quality of life decreases sharply. How can we use this image analogy to help Mr. Zhang? First, help Mr. Zhang to distill his fear of death, which is the inescapable destination of life for anyone, and the fear of death is also a normal psychological phenomenon that helps to improve the quality of human life. If no one fears death, no one will follow the rules, interpersonal conflicts will expand, death-defying ghosts will increase, AIDS will proliferate, and society will be in chaos. Secondly, let him understand that his fear of death exceeds the optimal level corresponding to the highest point of the parabola, i.e., it exceeds the level of fear corresponding to maintaining the best quality of life, and when there is the slightest discomfort, he thinks in a bad way, in the worst way, which naturally results in nervousness, anxiety, insomnia, reduced productivity and life satisfaction. The greater the level of fear, the lower the quality of life. Then, help him adjust his fear of death to the most appropriate point, analyze the process of the formation of susceptibility to fear of death, including childhood frailty, premature experience of death, current desire for life, etc., with a view to reducing his fear of death, so that he can come out of his hypochondriac state. Case 2: Liang Yue is a college student, just started her sophomore year, she was the first in her class in the first two semesters, but her recent state is not good, she feels that the school is very dilapidated, the dormitory environment is very bad, it is not a place for people to stay, except for studying is studying, now she does not want to live in school, even do not want to study, when studying, distracted, concentration is not good, memory also seems to be bad. What happened to the number one student in the class? Through in-depth conversation, we learned that Liang Yue had a lot of pressure to study. The average of the top nine in the six exams in the three years of college to qualify for the college entrance exam, the final admission of the top six. Oh, so that’s how it is. But Ryoetsu got first place in the first two exams, which should make her less nervous, so why is she complaining and bored with school? Ryoetsu said she studied very hard, and two students in the dormitory, who didn’t study much, were at the top of the class and were a big threat to her. It turned out that she was worried that she would not be able to keep her first place in the future. Her desire to be the first is so strong that she cannot devote herself to her studies, and her learning efficiency decreases, which stimulates her worry about not being able to keep the first place. The relationship between the horizontal coordinate of the desire to be the first and the vertical coordinate of the learning efficiency is also in line with the parabolic relationship. The relationship between the two is also parabolic, i.e., the learning efficiency does not increase continuously with the intensity of the desire to be the first, but there is also an optimal intensity, which corresponds to the highest learning efficiency. Beyond the optimum intensity, learning efficiency decreases sharply instead. This is manifested by poor concentration, memory loss, poor comprehension, and emotional states such as distraction and even aversion to learning. How can we use the parabolic relationship between learning efficiency and the desire to be number one to help Ryoetsu? First of all, help Liang Yue to distill his desire to be the first, being the first is something that anyone aspires to, and our society also advocates that “a soldier who does not want to be a general is not a good soldier”, wanting to be the first is a normal psychological phenomenon that helps individuals and the whole human society to develop continuously. If you don’t want to be the first, happy with what you have and don’t think about progress, you will lose the motivation to move forward, there is no invention, only vulgar repetition. The teacher is lazy to teach, the students are lazy to listen, no exams, the school simply closed. Secondly, let her understand that her desire to be the first exceeds a certain degree, that is, it exceeds the degree of playing their maximum potential and the highest learning efficiency, very much want to be the first, afraid of not being able to keep the first, the result of the mind with the wrong, nervous, anxious, memory loss, inattention, anorexia, although the first two exams were the first, but not from it to gain confidence, but worried about not being able to keep. There is a Chinese proverb that “people are more angry than others”, which is appropriate here. In addition, help her analyze why her desire to be the first is so strong. In order to reduce the intensity of her desire to be number one, so that she can come out of her anxiety and improve her study efficiency. Through the conversation, we also learned that she missed the undergraduate line by a few points in the college entrance examination and went to a specialist, but was the higher achiever in the class. However, the patient was psychologically unbalanced and felt sorry for him, vowing to study hard and strive for specialization, which is the motivation for Liang Yue to study hard and strive to be the first. This would have been unquestionable, positive and motivated, and should be appreciated. As long as it is put into action and study hard, bright moon also of is doing so, and has achieved certain results. However, the reality of the situation seems to be a bit harsh, such as “I study very hard, but there are a few students in the dormitory who usually do not study much, but are the top of the class, and have a great threat to themselves. Ryoetsu’s mind was occupied with this so-called “threat”, she wanted to get into the undergraduate school too much, wanted to be the first too much, in front of the “threat”, the past experience of failure reappeared, let her fear, so that she could not tolerate any little threat, exaggerated the unfavorable The first two times she was number one, she couldn’t see the advantage of being number one, and the cushion of not only being number one, but also being number six in the undergraduate program didn’t make sense to her. The more fearful she was, the worse her learning efficiency became, thus entering a vicious circle. The more fearful she was, the worse her study efficiency became, thus entering a vicious circle. Ryoetsu instinctively chose to escape, such as complaining about the poor school environment, the poor dormitory conditions, and the fact that it was not a place for people to stay, in order to find “excuses” for her future failure to get the first place, or even to leave this “huge” stressful place. Through this analysis, Ryoetsu will adjust his goals, not to be the first, the fifth or sixth can also be, the desire to be the first down a little, the fear of not being able to keep the first down a little. It is not a disadvantage to study hard, nor is it necessarily an advantage for others not to study hard, as long as they have done their best, played to their maximum potential, and got their best grades. Case 3: Yi is a sophomore in high school, 18 years old, the last six months there are frequent uncontrollable memories, accompanied by panic, general shaking, fear, fear that a girl will sue him in court, and thus can not focus on studying, so come to consult. The story began three years ago. There is a neighbor’s little girl, about three years younger than himself, usually not much interaction, three years ago there is a cousin because of school often live in their own home, the neighbor’s little girl often come to play with her cousin. Ayi also had the opportunity to interact with the neighbor girl. A Yi said the neighbor girl is not very pretty, but he always had an urge to hug her at that time. Once there was no one around, Yi suddenly embraced the neighbor girl, who was very surprised and instinctively broke away from his hug. Later, A Yi made a few more such moves, the little girl’s resistance seems less strong than the first time, and also some catering, but the two only hug. Six months later, A Yi moved, and since then no one has taken the initiative to contact each other, as if nothing had happened, each living their own lives. Six months ago, Yi suddenly developed the above symptoms. During the consultation, Yi told me repeatedly that he was very afraid that the little girl would not be able to think about it and would get sick, and that she would sue herself in court. For this reason, he consulted his classmates and family members, but they all said that things had been going on for so long that they would not sue him, and that there was no evidence to sue. A Yi’s fear not only did not ease, but grows every day. Why is Ah Yi so afraid? Let him make a hypothesis, if the little girl really got sick and really went to court to sue him, how should he face? He said I do not want to take the responsibility, want to know if the little girl got sick, how much responsibility he has. Up to this point, we can find that Yi has a strong desire to shirk responsibility. We can use the parabolic principle as usual, where the horizontal coordinate represents the desire to shirk responsibility and the vertical coordinate represents the quality of life or learning efficiency. Ayi is too eager to shirk responsibility for what he has done that he thinks is wrong, beyond a certain point, and as a result his quality of life drops sharply, fearing that the other party will sue him and make him take responsibility, and he cannot concentrate on his studies. How can we use this principle to help Yi? First, make him realize that doing something he thinks is wrong and choosing to avoid responsibility is an instinctive reaction. Second, this desire to avoid responsibility is so strong that he exceeds the degree of maintaining an optimal quality of life that he develops compulsive memories, fears, and other symptoms. Finally, help him pull his desire to avoid responsibility toward the most appropriate point. 18 years old is the watershed age of adulthood, and it is right to assume one’s due obligations and responsibilities. Regardless of any undesirable results, as long as it is their own responsibility, we should be brave enough to take on, what else can we worry about! In fact, there are many similar examples in life, a beautiful parabola, with horizontal and vertical coordinates, has a profound meaning. The horizontal coordinate can represent people’s fears, worries, anxieties, desires, motivations and all the seven emotions, representing everyone’s conscious activities and emotional experiences; the vertical coordinate represents the corresponding quality of life, work/study efficiency and so on. When we complain that the value of the vertical coordinate is not high enough, do we consider that the factors on the horizontal axis have either not reached the optimum point or have long since moved away from it?