An asexual marriage is one in which the couple has no physical illness or accident, but no tacit sexual intercourse for more than a month. Asexual marriage also refers to a relationship between a man and a woman who are married on the basis of a commitment not to have sex. Sexless marriages in China are increasing proportionally. The causes of sexless marriages are many and complex, such as feelings, ethics, morality, learning, extra-marital affairs, physiology, psychology, sexual indifference, responsibility, values, outlook on life, etc.
Theories
If we take the first criterion, it is said that one third of marriages in China are classified as sexless marriages. Sex is supposed to be the most important and exciting part of marriage, but for various reasons, sexless marriages exist in large numbers in our lives, and this is a fact that cannot be avoided. Although maintaining a sexless marriage may be missing or even meaningless, but Hegel said, what exists is reasonable. The existence of a sexless marriage, naturally, there is also its existence of reason, right, no sex and love, no love and righteousness, no righteousness and property, and even no property and still have a face, these seem to be the reasons for the marriage sexless but not dissolved.
The other situation of sexless marriage is that two people are married on the basis of the commitment not to have sex, this type of people have a special identity, that is, homosexuality, they do not have sex, each maintaining a relationship with homosexuals. Marriage is just to give an account to the family. If we take this as a criterion, it is said that 1/3 of marriages in China are sexless marriages. Therefore, it is said that China has entered an era of sexless marriages.
Sex is an important foundation for marital happiness. Perfect sex allows the man to get sexual satisfaction while also allowing the woman to experience pleasure and satisfaction, which is an integrity love. If only the man’s own satisfaction, that is a crippling sex. This is a Western view of sexual psychology. The perfect sex brings the pleasure of each other’s mood, each other deeper inner connection, so that men and women can be more tolerant of each other, understanding and acceptance of each other everything, to enhance the level of mutual feelings. Otherwise, it will leave the seeds of bad emotions, easy to become irritable, irritable, suspicious, jealous …… This is not conducive to the relationship between the two people in the marriage, it seems sexless marriage is not sustainable.
Perfect sex not only improves the intimacy and trust between two people, but also makes the body become good fitness wonder drug. Complete love promotes mutual health, while the unfulfilled partner in crippled sex can lead to negative health effects as a result. Therefore, a sexless marriage will not only jeopardize the relationship between two people, but also may endanger each other’s health.
According to research, sex three times a week can burn up to 7,500 calories a year. This is equivalent to jogging 120 kilometers in a year, in addition to the effect of weight loss, but also to enhance a person’s physical strength. Some studies have shown that regular sex can increase estrogen levels, a hormone that helps reduce or eliminate premenstrual syndrome in women, as well as relieve tension and release stress.
So sex plays a very important role in marriage. Psychologist Tao Si Xuan said if you do not choose to have a sexless marriage, and you still have expectations and requirements, if you can not change the sexless state through communication, perhaps the breakup is a liberation for each other, each other can find a more suitable partner again.
If you want to maintain such a passive sexless marriage, it is necessary to seriously discuss the real reasons for the sexlessness, find the reasons and then discuss the change plan, make the sexlessness become sexual and improve the quality of the marriage, which is truly responsible for your life.
Reason analysis
Separate bed due to different working hours, in order not to disturb each other’s rest, many couples discuss the usual separate bed, there is a “need” to sleep together again. Nowadays, most men find that they can’t do anything when they want to make out.
Sexless couples about 30% of couples living a “sexless” married life, the age is concentrated in the 30 to 50 years old between. The main reason for this is the psychological barriers that lead to physical barriers, and the most fundamental factor is the lack of communication and exchange.
In the survey of the 30% “sexless” sexual disorders found that most of them have a high income, work pressure, more social characteristics. And this part of the couple often go out very early every day, very late to go home, rarely talk to each other. There is also alcoholism, sinking gambling in the long run, the lack of communication between the couple will not only make the two sides “sexual interest” greatly reduced, over time, it is easy to occur on the male side ED (erectile dysfunction), premature ejaculation, female sexual apathy and other sexual decline, and similar phenomena in urban life has increased the trend.
Many couples are obsessed with the network, the extra time and energy to the virtual world of people to vent, naturally no longer attentive to the maintenance of the couple’s feelings. The Internet has become an important reason for the lack of communication between couples! And women after childbirth will be divided most of the energy to the children and left out of the husband, is also one of the reasons for the “sexless” marriage.
Adjustment
1, repair: is to change the state of sexlessness between the couple. Frankly speaking, the marriage itself is no impact on sex, but the relationship between the couple will affect sex. After marriage, the couple’s relationship to further deepen in order to make sex vitality, marriage should not be the end of love life but a gas station.
2, disintegration: liberate yourself and liberate each other. People’s life is very short, can enjoy the time of sex is even shorter, for women, especially short, why must let a marriage without life drag it! Many women in a sexless marriage state even if they have endured a long time, even if you can enjoy the time left a year, still can go for it, this is the positive attitude towards life.
3, maintenance: This is the attitude towards life that I disagree with the most. I advocate marriage for yourself and live for yourself. Whether it is a man or a woman, whether inside or outside the marriage, to be able to live for themselves, for themselves and marriage is in line with the true nature of life. But because of the moral influence, cultural influence social influence and many other influences in the sovereignty of marriage, too many marriages are accustomed to social responsibility and give up their own rights, in fact, I think this is a sad.
Warnings
Nowadays, social psychological pressure is getting bigger and bigger, and people are getting busier and busier living, while the quality of life is improving, the quality of psychological and sexual life is decreasing!
In fact, many experts are beginning to think about whether “sexless marriage” is approaching China. The so-called “sexless marriage” is a couple without physical disease or accident, but for more than a month without tacit sexual life. This problem exists to varying degrees in many countries around the world.
Japan is typical of the “sexless marriage” proliferation due to the pressure of work life. Fast-paced work, so that modern people in addition to the mental state is deteriorating, physical quality also declined significantly. Sex has become a valuable thing that modern people, who have licked their career achievements, have to give up. Long-term absence of sex can lead to many problems, such as a single spiritual life, emotional indifference, family cracks, which will also affect work, life and so on. The clinical research results of an “asexual ED (male erectile dysfunction)” completed by the Peking University First Hospital Male Center also showed that if there is no sex for more than 3 months, it may lead to a decline in male erectile function and even lead to ED, and also induce prostate enlargement, hypertrophy and other problems.
If you’re stuck in the traffic of the city and have no sex, you may want to give yourself and your partner a break and arrange a honeymoon once a year. The actual fact is that you will be able to get a lot more than just a couple of hours of your own time. What’s more, sex on vacation helps couples rekindle their love fire and become more intimate sexually. At the same time, couples should communicate with each other more, to enhance the emotional exchange between the couple, but also to learn how to manage their marriage and “sexual happiness”!
How important is sex to a marriage? When sex is gradually away from your life, what else is used to maintain the reason for marriage? Sex is no longer there, love is still there? Is there any other way to measure the happiness of a marriage besides sex?