Treat your children as human beings and understand the laws of their growth. Farmers planting crops, just rely on love, not, only know the way to plant crops to have a good harvest; education of children, only love, not enough, only understand the laws of child growth to have a good future.
A child was born, you can not “return”
Education of children is the most important and difficult learning of mankind, it is more difficult than any work.
Parents are the classroom teachers of their children never retire, with a lifetime of responsibility for their children. No matter what kind of child you are dealing with, there is no way to backtrack or “return” the product.
The fate of a child is in the hands of the parents. No matter how successful parents are in their careers, they can’t offset the failure of educating their children. Raising a genius into a mediocrity is the greatest crime against the family and human civilization. Since most families have only one child, we probably don’t even have the opportunity to correct our mistakes or to make amends, so we can only educate this only child successfully, which is almost the most important success of the family, and the most important success of your life. China’s most important need for education is not the child, but the parents.
Second, don’t miss the critical period of your child’s development
Critical period of development: It is a period of time when a certain human behavior, skill and knowledge mastery develop fastest and are most easily influenced.
If you give your child the right education during the critical period of development, he will learn quickly and well, and often receive twice the result with half the effort; once you miss the critical period, learning will take several times the effort to make up for it, or even will never be able to make up for it.
How much do you know about the critical periods of children’s development, such as
(1) Critical period for learning to chew (6 months)
(2) Critical period of order and normality (2.5-6 years) The critical period for the formation of children’s behavior and habits, the character, behavior and habits formed during this period often do not change until they grow up. “The age of three years old, seven years old.”
(3) Critical period of language development (3-6 years old)
(4) Critical period for imaginative development (2-8 years old)
(5) Culturally sensitive period (6-10 years old): Many children in this period are very curious, brainy, and have an exceptional number of questions. The child’s desire to know should be satisfied.
(6) Golden reading period (8-14 years old): If you miss this period of scientific reading guidance and a lot of reading, it will cause irreparable deficiencies to the child’s growth.
(7) the key period of independence (12-15 years old): this period is not grasped, the child will never grow up.
Three, “8 suggestions” for parents
1, (said to the father) the road from work should be the road home.
After the child is in junior high school, he needs his father’s care more. As a father, you must realize the responsibility of education on your own shoulders and remember: the way from work should be the way home. Children who eat with their parents are better. According to research institutes: middle school students who have dinner with their parents get better nutrition, higher academic achievement, and rarely smoke, drink, do drugs, fight, or have early sex.
Don’t educate your children while they are eating and sleeping; don’t turn any conversation with your children into education for them.
2.Parents study well, children go up every day.
Parents change, children change. Most of the child’s problems are caused by improper parenting. When a child is “sick”, parents must “take medicine”. A good parent is a good school. Parents are the best “model” for their children. Teaching by example is more important than teaching by words. Parents should grow up together with their children.
3, the premise of education is to understand the child.
Treat your child as a human being and understand the laws of growth of your child. As the famous American educator Dewey said earlier, “Children are not adults who have not yet grown up, but have their own intrinsic value during childhood. When children enter junior high school, it is very easy for them to close themselves off. Parents must understand their children and find the language code to communicate with them, but they should pay attention to “words” like gold.
Mature parents should learn child pedagogy, psychology, read more homeschooling books and magazines, understand the characteristics and laws of children at different stages of growth, often communicate with their children to understand what their children are thinking and doing.
4, we must control the child, the key is how to control.
The most basic purpose of education is to cultivate “normal people”.
The “one hand”, “one eye” and “one tendon” education are not desirable.
Educate your children in a different way.
Try to enrich your own education methods.
5, to be a parent who knows how to love will love.
Many parents love confused, love misplaced, and sometimes love too much.
Do not raise “super babies”.
Love is an art. Love needs to be expressed and acted upon. Sometimes a hug is worth a thousand words.
Love in moderation, don’t let your love overflow into a flood. The result of spoiling love is harm.
6. You can’t teach your child in public.
Even if the child did the worst thing, you want to educate him should also bring the child home, public scolding, beating, often with very serious consequences. The safest and most effective way to educate children is to do it in private, praise can be public, criticism to do the secret, even if your starting point is right, but the way if improper, not only ineffective, or even counterproductive.
We need to realize that whatever praise and criticism of children is an emotional interaction, parents are too strong, often resulting in children are no good, parents are too rough, children are often equally manic temperament. Wise teachers do not need to reprimand their students, and wise parents are always able to realize that they cannot pursue immediate results in educating their children.
The most important thing in education is to respect the human dignity of people, to protect the child’s mind, can not do this, there is no real education to speak of.
7. Do not leave your children completely in the hands of elders or nannies.
Anyone needs access to two basic elements: one is love, and the other is security. The happy person is happy because he has both love and security. The unfortunate person is unfortunate either because he has only love and no security, or because he has only security and no love. The most unfortunate people are those who have neither love nor security.
For a child, he desperately craves love and desperately craves security. Between the two elements of love and security, the absence of either element will constitute irreparable damage to the child’s development.
A child’s security comes from the company of his parents. Wherever his parents are, that is his home. Voltaire: “For Adam, heaven is his home; yet for Adam’s descendants, home is their heaven.”
8. Praise your teacher more in front of your children.
Learn to look at the teacher with an appreciative eye. Parents and teachers are comrades in the same trench, and must form an alliance with the teacher. If parents in front of their children always rambling about the teacher’s “not”, criticize the teacher, and even quarrel with the teacher, will only increase the child’s rejection of the teacher. In the long run, the victim is the child, the loss is the parents.
So let the child grow up like a child is to respect the laws of child growth. Treat your child as a human being and understand the laws of growth of your child. Farmers grow crops, just by love, not, only understand the way to grow crops to have a good harvest; education of children, only love, not enough, only understand the laws of child growth to have a good future.