Use these strategies to prevent and reverse feelings of loneliness: Strategy 1: Make a list of your expectations in terms of relationships. In order to meet people who are genuinely good for you, ask yourself, “What traits in that person are most important to me?” Then list them one by one. For example: 1. Allowing me to speak my mind and not judging me. 2. A good sense of humor. 3. Consistency between words and actions. 4. Both spiritual and intuitive faculties are open. 5.People are kind and lovely. Figuring out your priorities will help you clarify what you need. I don’t want you to seek good hope by simply socializing behavior; I want you to set specifically what qualities you need to have in a person and then work to find them. Strategy 2: Seeking should be done by: seeking common ground. When you’re alone, it’s hard to go out on your own initiative, but I have a tip here that will make it easy for you to do so. The key to communication is to look at what you have in common with others, and not just see the differences between you. This is especially useful at parties, where I tend to be alone and bored in a corner, talking to my friends who are there with me. Since I’m shy, it’s hard for me to break the ice and interact with strangers. They seem like a faction to me, and I don’t want to intrude into territory that is not my own. These kinds of thoughts intensified my loneliness, as if I was surrounded by an unfriendly world. Then I remembered my mentor’s words, “Even though we behave differently, there is nothing fundamentally different.” I began to perceive that I had much in common with the other participants, and smiled and struck up conversations, no longer hiding in the corner. The root of people being divided into groups is that we don’t see what we have in common with each other. So, when you interact and communicate with people, try to find the similarities with each other and never focus on the differences. Strategy 3: Communicate with yourself and take time for loneliness at all costs. Solving the problem of loneliness requires you to connect with others as well as yourself. That’s why it’s important to find the exact rhythm of engaging yourself in things and staying alone. You may want to phase out the phone calls, word work and long-windedness in order to seek inner clarity. You will find that there is a big difference between being alone and being lonely. Tell those around you that you are doing self-mastery during this time and they will respect your choice. Say to yourself, “I am spending time with an excellent person, and that person is myself!” Whether you are walking in the woods or doing meditation, be mindful of the wonderfulness you find in yourself. This is the inner you and your best companion. If you regularly self-adjust to your true inner self, you will never be alone. Strategy 4: Turn to dreams. When you feel lonely, look to your dreams for solutions. Set a question before you go to bed, and early the next morning write down the dream in your note book and find the answer from it. Do this every night for a week. For example: I had a patient who was extremely complacent and asked herself this: “How can I be a little less lonely?” Later, she dreamed: In late winter, I was in a warm room with a fire with my friends. Outside was a horrible snowstorm. I left the crowd and drove miles away into the snow to face the open road alone. It was a lonely, fearful journey, and I didn’t ask anyone to accompany me. This patient’s dream reflected the message that she could get emotional support (the warmth of friends) if she wanted it. She shouldn’t have to face everything alone. Like many people who are too independent, she submitted to the loneliness, not realizing that this could only be self-inflicted. The dream prompted her to do something else, and she did it. Again, you can benefit from the dream. Strategy 5: Value the various relationships that exist. It’s important to be aware of the positive aspects of the various relationships you already have, but this bar doesn’t mean you have to constantly interact with people. For example, you love nature, animals, music or your own warm home. These indicate that you have the potential ability to connect with people, and foretell that you will receive a strong response once you seek support from your circle of friends.